Break Night
by Sharmander
Summary: Because where there is sex, drugs and rock n' roll, there is always love, lies and drug dealers. -Discontinued-
1. Welcome To The Jungle

**Break Night: **Slang for staying up all night on a cocaine binge until daybreak.

_Regular disclaimers apply._

* * *

**Break Night**

Chapter I : Welcome To The Jungle  
_Axel Steel_

"Ahh, fuck," I watch Riku as he tosses his head back, snorting loudly while he plugs his nostrils with his thumb and index finger. He shakes his head a few times and stares up at the ceiling; I look up too just to see if there are any crazy patterns playing against the off-white paint. To my disappointment there isn't anything but that horrible excuse of a colour, though I sort of knew what to expect. I've been staring at his ceiling on and off again since we came back from the club.

It reminds me of hospital food, or maybe even baby food all bland and lifeless— his ceiling that is, not the club. Baby food doesn't even have salt, and basically everything with some sort of flavor has salt. That gets me thinking, what do babies think while they eat that crap? Do they even realize all the other things they could be tasting and experiencing are a million times better? Well I guess they don't because they don't know about the other things, all they know about is shitting, eating that mush and sleeping. I wish I could remember what I was like as a baby (all gummy smiles, soft skin and innocence). But as fate would have it, I've taken too many baseball bats and fists to the head, and smoked too much dope to have enough brain cells to actually remember that far back.

I do remember my _child_hood, like when you really start living like a human being and you're not just a mass of flesh and spit. I remember once when I was five, I stood outside of a red pick up while my mom went to get money for her fix. She told me to hold her cigarette _'cause she'd only be five minutes_ and I held it, but out of nowhere the thought of actually trying it popped into my tiny head and well, I did. I took a puff of the cigarette and almost puked out my grape juice because it was rancid. Funny thing is, I took another puff and by the time my mom stepped out of the pick up truck, hoarking out thick spit and wiping her mouth on the back of her hand, her cigarette was almost finished. I stood there like a pro, cancer stick in-between my middle and index finger as I took a drag, just like dear ol'mama. She didn't scream at me though, she just plucked it out of my fingers and took the last drag, crushing it under the leather tip of her metal heel stiletto and grabbed my hand. She pulled me away from the red pick up truck and took me to her dealer's house. Ah, good times…_as if_.

"Hey Ku, what you staring at?" I ask, pushing the thought of my mother out of my head and he looks at me, his eyes look like their glowing as the sun rises off in the horizon. Its rays shinning through the window and into his teal coloured irises, making his platinum hair seem almost white. He's always been this really handsome guy, ever since I met him in elementary, though I don't know why he'd change. Good-looking kids naturally grow up to be good-looking adults or whatever.

When I met him, he was beating the shit out of an eighth grader because the guy said his mother was a whore. I stood there watching until he pulled away from the curled up boy, who was at least 10 sizes bigger. The big boy was muttering apologies, begging him to stop and Riku looked at me all-tough like, his fist cocked and asked if I wanted a go, because he was _totally_ fucking ready. It was then that I realized this kid was a fucking spastic mess and in my head, I added it all up. I was sly and clever being able to work my way out of a fight because, if you want to know the hard, honest truth, I can't fight at all. Anyway, I realized that should the situation ever arise where I couldn't talk my way out of something, I'd need muscle. We've been together ever since and he's grown on me over the years.

I found out later, I mean a lot later, that he had been born a snow baby (though he tells me his mom didn't use as much during pregnancy) which explains why he's so fucked in the head and spastic. I also found out that his mom actually _was_ a whore, but she's dead so saying anything like that is just rude. You can insult a guy's father till you're blue in the face and he'd probably not give a damn, but say something about his mother and he'll impale you Vlad Tepes style. I know _I'm_ like that, actually, I think all men are like that. Mothers are sacred.

"The ceiling, what's it look like?" he replies and I go to say baby food, but I see the smirk and I shake my head instead, ignoring his smart-ass comment. After spending half my life with Riku, I've learnt to let it all slide because it's never really worth an argument. He's just like that, waiting for the moment to pounce, because even if we're best friends, Riku lives for the chance to wrestle someone to the ground. He passes the mirror to me, along with the little cut up, red straw that I pinch between my fingers, bending the plastic a little as I stare at it. I don't know why I do; it's probably because the red looks way too bright between my boney fingers. Riku watches me curiously until I place the mirror on the coffee table and lean over.

Snort, tilt your head back, and stare up at the ceiling even if there is never anything there. Hope never dies, does it? No. It doesn't.

It's almost a ritual between Riku and me, looking at the ceiling after your rail. We've been doing this ever since his older brother (May God keep his soul) became a coke dealer and decided, like any good male role-model, to give his little brother and his friends free blow. It was probably because we never had a lot of food and he didn't want Riku starving to death. He just gave him a little coke to suppress his hunger, or at least I think that's why. He could have just been bored and wanted to see us trip out, who knows what really went on in his head. He was totally fucked. However, he did keep us from doing it every day, he kept us leveled and made sure we'd stay in school. He was a good person like that, aside from his insanity; he did have a mother hen like persona.

I remember once, when he bent over (even if I was almost his height) and ruffled our hair. Both Riku and I had our natural hair colours (Riku blonde, me brown), he said, "You're great kids, stay that way no matter what you do because the drugs live for you, you don't live for the drugs.", and I've lived my life by that since.

I snort once more and rub my thumb over the faint traces of white powder, then press the pad of my thumb to my lips, rubbing the residue into my gums until my mouth goes numb. I pass the mirror back to Riku. I hate the way blow tastes, it sort of has this earwax like flavor and it makes me nicker like a horse, puffing my cheeks out and scrunching my nose kind of retardedly. Riku never says anything about it and never has, though I know he sees it and hears me making weird noises in the background. Riku though, doesn't care much about the taste. I mean, as a fetus he was practically submerged in the stuff so he doesn't even notice it (I'm probably more than just exaggerating).

He empties more blow onto the mirror and grabs his razor. He's had it since we were sophomores, given to him by his brother when he deemed us man enough to crush our own coke. Riku's never used another razor and takes care of that one with his life, heaven forbid he misplaces it. Come to think of it though, I wouldn't want to use a different one either. I dread to think what's going to happen when that thing finally dulls down to the point of no fixing. His brother didn't live long enough to see us actually use the razor; he was shot to death in his apartment a few hours later while filling baggies. My memory fails me when it comes to the exact details of what led to it, but I'm sure it had something to do with owning someone money.

I've never actually had to comfort someone crying, and when Riku started to cry that night, I was so awkward about holding him, especially since I was all _sexually confused_ as the experts now-a-days say. I'll admit, I bawled like a baby when Kadaj died but not around Riku. Riku, if you get him drunk enough and start talking about his brother, will still cry tears of blood, even six years later. That will probably be the only time you'll ever see the great Riku Jones cry. Shortly after, Riku became a real dealer, not just selling the baggies his brother would spare him.

Come to think of it, I never made Riku face the awkwardness of comforting someone, not because I've never needed it but because I never wanted to cry in front of him. However, he probably would have comforted me if I had. Anyway, when I was called to the morgue to identify my mother, who'd been missing for the greater half of a month, I didn't start crying until later that night when I was alone, holding that one lock of hair they give you.

In the morgue, I just glanced down at the porcelain face of my junkie mother who'd been found in a gutter (so damn cliché, I know). Her brown hair matted down with blood and other filth, yet I thought she was beautiful. She was my mother, she'd always be beautiful. Anyway, I was 17 at the time and when we got back to the apartment, this one we live in now, I went to shower and cried harder than I ever had in my life.

"Isn't there a rule about doing your own drugs?" I chuckle, forcing Kadaj and my mother out of my mind and focusing on the way Riku makes rails. It's like an art to him, carefully setting them up and making sure they are all similar in thickness. I'd say he takes his time but really it only takes him a few seconds. Riku looks up after snorting a fat line of coke. He smirks at me and wipes the bottom of his nose, because having residue there is always awkward and uncomfortable, and he sniffles a bit before being able to properly answer.

"Yeah, but I've been breaking rules since day one," he says cockily and leans down, snorting the next line like a pro before pushing the mirror to me. He tilts his head back as I grab the mirror from him. Riku breathes deeply before dipping his pinky into a baggie, and rubbing it against his gums, as I did not too long ago. He doesn't even flinch at the taste, instead his jaw starts sliding back and forth and I know he's so high right now he can fucking run his fingers through the Almighty's beard way up in heaven.

"Always the rebel," I say before snorting up my own two lines. I start thinking, remembering this conversation I had with a girl one time. She was a real die-hard feminist, and she told me, that god was a female. Every now and again, I think about her and about what she said. Well, in my mind God (if it even exists) would have to be asexual because he made people in his own image so therefore he can't be a man or a woman.

I'll stop right there though, because if I start going into religion I will blow a gasket.

We hear a loud knock at the door and Riku jumps a few feet into the air, clutching at his chest and shoots me a look, his eyes wide and pupils dilated to the point where his teal iris is only a thin outline. He's already panicking and his fingers are twitching as he stares at the white door then at me over and over. I look at it too, a hell of a lot calmer than my wired friend, though I'll admit that my heart's also pounding and it isn't just because of the vast amounts of cocaine in my system. We both realize around the same time that the only people coming by our apartment at the break of dawn are Demyx and Zexion. He gets up just as I wipe the mirror with my finger; he swings the door open as I rub the powder along my gum line, and by God does this ever taste _foul_.

Demyx runs in, jumps over the couch's backrest like a gymnast and I'd give him a 7.5 if I was a judge, I mean he has form and all but it's just not refined or anything. Then again what would I know? I've never even seen one of those competitions in my life. I've seen an air guitar competition though, while I was at this dude's house. I watched it while I gave him head…it gave me something to concentrate on rather than the way his pubes tickled the tip of my nose when I swallowed him. But that's a different time.

Zexion waltzes in at a much slower pace than Demyx. He's one of those quiet types, the type of guy that usually starts the massacres at schools and everyone is always like '_but he was _such_ a nice kid'._ Which is why I try and always stay on his good side, that way if he should snap one day, I won't be on the opposite side of his barrel. Riku disappears into the kitchen, probably to slow his heart rate before he has a heart attack.

"Hey, you guys doing lines?" Demyx, one of my closest buddies, says, always one to point out the obvious. As if Riku and I spend our time doing anything else.

"Yeah dude, pull out a straw," I drawl, my knee jumping to a steady beat that's not too clear to me though I'm pretty sure it's Thunder Struck by AC fucking DC.

I'm in love with classic Rock n' Roll and I think I will be till the end of time. Sure, I like some music from modern times but Rock n' Roll really captures my life and paints it out perfectly. Like, what was that song called again? Old Time Rock n' Roll, I think…Yeah, that's a good fucking song. I can't relate much to Lady Gaga, mostly because I don't know what the fuck she is talking about half the time and I just can't concentrate past her weird, fucking ridiculous clothes.

I'd like to think that if anyone ever decided to make a movie about me; its soundtrack would be all Guns, Queen, Zeppelin and all those other blow-your-fucking-mind bands that really get the party started, because I'd like to think that I get the party fucking started. People in my life movie would definitely all be wearing normal clothes. Sorry.

"'Course, 'cause you know, I keep one in my wallet," Demyx laughs, but pulls out his wallet and retracts a straw from its depths. Of course he keeps one in his wallet, why wouldn't he? Then again, Demyx has always been more of a weed type of person. But you just can't be best friends with a coke dealer (Riku) and his sidekick (me) without doing blow every now and then. It just isn't the way these things work.

I notice all the bills neatly stacked in between the leather of his old wallet and I smirk at him, raising a nicely penciled in red eyebrow. It pisses me off when people dye their hair and leave their eyebrows a different fucking colour and it doesn't even look nice. I mean, there's classical arched black eyebrows and blonde hair but that's just…a classic. You can't say bad things about classics.

Now, when your eyebrows clash with your hair, you aren't doing something right in life. This is why I pencil in my eyebrows, well that and because I burnt them off thinking there were gremlins living in their depths. Once they were gone, never to return, I realized that no, gremlins would probably live in your ear or something. Somewhere dark and cave-like, not in your eyebrows.

"Mum and dad's pay day?" I ask with a smirk that just does not want to leave my face, but that is partially because of the blow pumping in my veins. Blow makes me happy.

Demyx just laughs loudly, dumping a bit of coke on the mirror for himself, probably stoned already; he tilts his head in Zexion's direction, the quiet boy just sitting there like he always does. I swear I've heard him talk like three times in all the years of knowing him, at first I even thought he was mute or something.

"Yo Z, bring out the weed…it's time the party starts for real," Demyx says before picking up the razor and creating four neat little lines. He never met Kadaj, but he heard the stories from a very drunk and depressed Riku (I told you he still cries tears of blood). Demyx was real cool about it, he picked up the razor, and kissed it with the same tenderness an old catholic lady would kiss the Pope's gold and diamond studded fingers. He hugged Riku then and told him while holding the razor high up, that Kadaj was _livin' large now like someone of his caliber should_ because just from hearing Riku talk, Demyx knew Kadaj was a great person, apparently.

I wish I could have been as comforting as Demyx. I mean, because the way Riku's face lit up…it was like he'd found peace. I remember that even Zexion had said something to Riku, it was real quiet, and he put his tiny pale-as-hell hand on Riku's shoulder. Till this day I don't know what he said, it was just in Riku's ear and Demyx didn't seem to mind much. I mean…if the person I was madly in love with whispered in another dude's ear, I'd be pissed, but it was Riku so I don't think he cared. Whatever Zexion said made Riku tear up and hug the shit out of the boy. If I think too much about it, I get really curious.

Demyx snorts the two lines up easily, then dips his fingers in the near by glass of water and slides them up his nose quickly like he always does. I've never asked him why, because I've never cared enough to actually ask. I know other people do it, I just don't know _why_. People assume that because I've been doing drugs for the greater half of my life, that I know everything there is to know about drug use, but the truth is, I really don't. I just do them, I don't research the shit. I would have stayed in school if I wanted to research bullshit.

Demyx pushes the mirror in Zexion's direction as the pale midget pulls a blunt from his coat pocket and passes it to Demyx. The thing is the size of a baseball bat, and I'm not exaggerating this time. "Some of us have to work," I say but I pull out my Zippo, flicking off the top with a twist of my wrist and Demyx rolls his big ol' baby blues at me because, who am I kidding? I could care less about going to work completely ruined. No one would notice anyway because I work in this crumby little café that only has its rush hour around 5:30 pm, and by that time I'm long gone.

"Axel Steel saying no to drugs?" Riku shouts from wherever he is and I have to laugh at that before turning back to Demyx with my lighter.

"Oh, what a gentleman," Demyx laughs as the blunt lights easily and he takes a long drag. The reason he called me a gentleman is that at The Red Label and probably many other clubs, it means you want to fuck the person if you light their cigarette for them. It's a polite way of showing it I guess, instead of walking right up to them and saying _"Wanna do the dog?"_

I always found that amusing and I've spent countless nights lighting the cigarette upon cigarette of random people, just for the amusement.

Demyx's eyes flutter closed as if he's orgasming and my mouth waters at the sight of the blunt because if there is one thing I love as much as coke and classic rock, it's fucking weed. I remember being told once by someone that giraffes have THC in their blood, which leads to me wondering if giraffes walk around stoned 24/7 since birth. If that's the case, I know what I want to come back as in the next life. I want to be a fucking _giraffe_.

"Fuck Riku, play some music!" I say, forgetting about work and giraffes, gazing at the silver haired idiot who's sitting on the dinning room table. A table that hasn't been used since the night we bought it and dragged it home from that hippie rummage sale. Riku looks at me and smirks, knowing that I have this insatiable urge to listen to music whenever I'm tweaking. For a minute he seems like he isn't going to play music but then he slides off the table and dances over to the stereo system. My knee is jumping at a quick pace, there isn't even a beat anymore and Demyx looks at it as he passes the blunt over to me. His eyes seem entranced with the movement and he watches my knee through the tear in my jeans.

"This is real good shit. I got it from Xigbar, who got it from some Mexicans his dealer smuggled over the boarder," Demyx says, tearing his eyes away from my whiter-than-the-moon knee as I take a hit. Immediately, it rushes through me and my head swirls right into the fucking clouds. So high I almost head butt God's vagina or…shit…head butt something because I remember that God doesn't have a gender, and for a few seconds I'm kind of confused until I think...Fuck it. I smirk around the blunt in my mouth and take another puff. It tastes like chocolate.

Welcome to the Jungle starts blaring and I shoot up from my seat as Riku slides into the living room on his knees, fingers dancing along an invisible fret as he tries to follow Slash's amazing skill with his own. In his mind, he's got a guitar to play. Demyx automatically starts playing the air drums and I tilt my head back and sing _"Oh my god…Wooooooooooooo!"_

Riku's guitar really amazes me, or well his air guitar. I know he can play this song off memory, so seeing him pretend is almost as good as seeing the real deal. I just gotta use my imagination is all, and I'm fairly good at using it. Demyx seems to have a real drum kit in front of him, with the way he's tapping at the air and using his foot to pound on the imaginary pedal. My parts coming up again…

"_Welcome to the jungle, we got fun n' games. We got everything you want, honey we know the names!" _

After the first words are spoken, it starts us all up. Everyone's shouting out the lyrics, playing their invisible instruments (except for Zexion), while I swing around my invisible microphone, pelvic thrusting to the beat of the song. I was told once, that I should probably do something about my out-of-control sex drive. But my sex drive is perfectly under control as long as I'm not turning to fucking animals. I know for a fact that I'd never defile a furry critter. I mean, that could be considered rape and that's just not my bag of tea, plus…they aren't even human. The person who said that about me just couldn't handle so much sex appeal in one sitting. I'm a very sexual being; I think it's in my genes or something.

"_We are the people that can find whatever you may need. If you got the money honey, we got your disease!"_

Zexion watches us, a smirk on his lips as he holds the blunt for Demyx, who takes two tokes then Zexion passes it to me. I sing around it, taking my hits as I walk towards Riku who takes it from me just as his guitar solo pounds out of the speakers.

I love this part so I throw my head back; using the voice I usually reserve for singing at The Red Label and just belt it out.

"_And when you're high you never ever wanna come down, so down, so down, so down YEEEEEEEEEAH-AH-AH-AAAAH-AAAH-AAH-AAAH!"_

Riku holds the slowly shrinking blunt between his lips and his fingers play out the notes on the air guitar at an inhuman speed, I bet if he had his real guitar out, it would sound so fucking _amazing_.

"_You know where you are? You're in the jungle baby…you're gonna dieeee!"_

This lasts until the neighbors start punching their side of the wall and we're forced to lower the volume. Unless we want the coppers dropping by and finding tons of coke all over the coffee table and then some in the bedroom and 4 blazed men in an apartment. That is never easy to explain and really, I don't want to suck off another cop to avoid being jailed. You're probably thinking, Whoa hold the phone Buddy, you sucked off a cop? Well yeah, I did.

I was 16 at the time and the cop was a real nasty pig. He said he'd let us all go, scotch free, if the precious lips doing all the smack talk would blow him, and me being a big mouth…well, naturally I was the one doing all the sassing. So, I braced myself and dropped to my knees, I was drunk and drunks have no shame.

Riku was telling me it wasn't worth it and that going to jail _ain't so bad_ but I knew for a fact that it was. We'd be going in for quite some time for possession and assault (because Riku attacked the cop), plus whatever lies this sonuvabitch threw in there. I also didn't like the idea of being shanked and raped at the same time. Plus, it seems like dick sucking is a talent in my family (must be hereditary or something) because I've always been really good at it. I had the pig busting a nut in my mouth in 5 minutes flat and I spit that shit right near his shoe. We got away with it, and I've lived perfectly fine with myself after that. Though, I know that copper won't ever be able to find someone to give him head as good as me.

I sit down, smirking as the blunt is passed off to Demyx again, and Riku drops down at my feet, smiling like a kid on Christmas morning. Demyx sighs taking a drag, then seems to remember something; he's probably been meaning to tell us for a month or so knowing him.

"Hey, you guys remember the twins you wanted to tag-team?" he says randomly and I sit up a little straighter grabbing the blunt from Demyx. My brain provides the memory of blonde, wispy hair and sky blue eyes. There were these twins that bought drugs off Riku that we wanted to fuck in high school. I wouldn't say exactly _tag-team_ because two sacs smacking together is alright, four just has to be crossing the line. Though, I'd probably be able to get off with Riku in the room, both of us fucking at the same time but not touching each other. I have a thing where hearing people moan really turns me on, regardless of who the hell they are.

"Yeah, what about them?" Riku asks taking a swig from a can of Coca-Cola that he produced from God knows where while I pass down the blunt. His voice holds a hint of interest; I'm surprised and _impressed_ that he remembers the twins from way back when, though it wasn't that long ago. If my math doesn't fail me, like it always has, it's been three or four years. After graduation, they left the city, no one really knows where or at least I don't.

"They're coming back, moving in with Kairi and Naminé," Demyx says, pulling at the rest of the blunt and crushing it into the ashtray. The apartment probably smells so much like weed, it'd be enough to get someone stoned if they just took a good, hard wiff of our couch or something. I'd have to try that later after work.

"Kairi stopped talking to me," Riku groans, tossing his head back, successfully landing it in my lap and I look down at him smirking. Kairi is this girl we also met in high school. She's a fucking crazy ass bitch who'll do anything for a really good time, though when she's sober she's pretty cool but seldom are the times when she's not on something. She kind of smells like fruit and ocean mist, and she's a bit of an airhead but I guess that's what happens when you've been popping pills and all the other shit she does since you were 10.

"Guess you didn't satisfy her, cause she still talks to me," I say, really just to push his buttons because in all honesty Kairi and me didn't really do anything. I ended up puking all over myself and Vexen appeared out of nowhere and fucked her while I passed out on the floor. Riku tries to head butt me backwards, though it doesn't work as well as he probably hoped and it looks funny as hell.

"No, it's 'cause I fucked her sister in the morning," he laughs happily and I smirk down at him, eyebrow raised high and he smirks back.

"Naminé?" I ask and he nods, I extend my hand for the high five, which he gives with a laugh. "Got me some of that too," I say as he slaps his palm against mine. With Naminé I actually got somewhere, though we were both tripping on Special K and Ecstasy at the time and really didn't know where we were or what we were doing. Naminé's a real soft girl, though underneath that shy, quiet exterior lies something dark and a little frightening. I speak from experience here. She's sort of like Zexion, in the quiet, would-be-most-likely-to-kill-someone type of way, though I'm more scared of the blonde than I am of him. She just isn't right in the head. I mean, while I was fucking her, she told me to call her all these horrible names, I was so fucked I didn't even notice until the next morning when I remembered. I felt like shit but she told me to shut up and left when I apologized.

Demyx rolls his eyes, but laughs anyway. "So, how long has it been since y'all slept?" Demyx says after a while, leaning against Zexion as the boy channel surfs with wide (or at least I _think_ they're wide), blood shot eyes, and I watch them feeling a longing twist in my chest.

Demyx is so in love with the blue-haired guy, it's kind of sickeningly sweet. One day, I think I'll find that. Actually, I _have_ to find that for my own sanity. I need to know love really exists because I've never felt it in my life before and contrary to popular belief, children that have grown up in loveless homes can love. I know I can love, I just haven't found _them_ yet, you know? The one person I want to give my heart and soul to.

"Since yesterday's show," I reply shaking the thoughts of love out of my head and Riku nods his head making Demyx snort loudly. He's already passing the one paper he got from God knows where to Riku who takes a hit and passes it up to me. I don't know if I should take it or not…I'm pretty fucked up already…I've never said no to a joint before though. I take it, with some difficulty because for some reason I just know it's going to burn me. Riku and I stay there for quite some time trying to transfer the thing and when I finally get it, I wiggle with excitement, causing Riku to laugh.

"When's the next show?" Riku asks after he's done laughing at me. He slowly stretches across the carpet, holding his head up on his palm as he watches the colours dance around on the TV screen. His jaw sliding back and forth.

I pass the joint back to Demyx, exhaling as I lean over Riku and shrug my shoulders, turning to watch whatever Zexion put on. It's this kids cartoon, seeing as it's the only thing that plays at seven in the morning no one complains, plus its trippy shit…which makes it good.

"I'm pretty sure it's tomorrow night at The Red Label," Demyx says and I groan before looking around the living room, realizing my agenda is nowhere to be found.

"I'll check in my agenda," I say out loud and everyone laughs at me, the apartment filling with the sounds of gasped breaths and snorts as everyone chokes on air at my expense. The sounds of them laughing make me burst out laughing. I have no idea how I'm going to be able to work like this.

"I can't believe a fucking druggie keeps an agenda," Riku says, his jaw still working away at grinding his teeth down to nothing and I glare at him, before laughing at the absolute truth behind that.

"Someone's gotta keep our shit organized…Now shut up and stop tweaking," I say reaching into my back pocket and tossing him my pack of gum before pulling out my cigarettes and lighting up, because on top of everything I'm addicted to nicotine.

Riku takes the gum with a smile, passing it to Demyx who claims that eating gum while stoned is an utter trip. He yelps in happiness, popping a piece into his mouth and chomping down on the sugary stick.

"Fuck, I have to be at work in an hour," I hiss, standing to get ready for work. Because unlike Demyx and Zexion who are well provided for by Demyx's stinking rich family, with his fat ass bank account, and Riku who's job is sitting around all day and dealing drugs, I have to go clock in at a café down the street no later then 8:30 am to earn my money. I stand up and stretch, telling everyone I'm off to shower and they laugh at me as I grumble about low paying jobs and ugly aprons.

I walk into the bathroom, literally the first time. Smacking into the door hard, putting out my cigarette with it before realizing I have to turn the knob and open the door. Finally I get inside, throwing my crushed cigarette butt into the toilet, pealing off my clothes and tossing them into the corner of the room. The chains on my pants rattle as they hit the tiles, making me giggle a little. I stop long enough to turn on the tap, hot water (almost boiling) starts pouring out and I step under quickly. My body feeling strangely grimy or maybe that's just the drugs or the fact that I haven't showered in 8 days give or take.

I hear Riku and Demyx yelling about something on TV, scrambling to get the phone because Riku simply needs whatever the infomercial is showing. Demyx already shouting out his credit card number, but then I decide to listen to the water as it pounds against the porcelain under my feet and against my body. It sounds like a waterfall or a rainstorm and I just listen to it, closing my eyes and imagining a rainforest bustling with life. Animals skittering all around in the grand ecosystem as I stand under the heavy rainfall, arms spread out wide as I inhale the humid air into my lungs. Finally something that won't tic years off my life's clock. I realize how great this is and that I have to call Demyx and make him listen because I know he loves water and nature.

"Dem!" I scream loudly and hear him rush down the hall and into the bathroom, another set of footsteps is heard and I can see two heads from behind the shower curtain as the door bursts open. One is definitely Demyx, his spiky mullet showing clearly, then I see a smooth head and know its Riku.

"What's going on?" he asks, and I laugh loudly.

"Since when are you Demyx?" I tease and Riku chuckles before I explain to them why I called Demyx into the bathroom. "Shut up and listen, it sounds like rain…and feels like, you're standing in the rainforest cause of the humid air, in the middle of all these trees and just…at peace," I breathe and they go dead silent, standing there just listening to the hot water as I lather myself up and watch the suds swirl down the drain. I try not to get grossed out because the water sort of washes away with a grey tint.

"Shit…it does," Demyx says quietly and I start shampooing my hair, traces of red dye trickling down and disappearing right after the soap. It looks like a peppermint candy or something.

I notice they stay standing there for a while, I can see them every time I turn, but I don't run them out just yet. Bathrooms can get really lonely sometimes and just having them standing there is comforting. I'm almost done though, so they'll have to leave.

"You can both leave now, I'm coming out," I say rinsing out my hair and they laugh before rushing out of the bathroom when I turn off the tap. I step out and wrap my hair in the black towel Riku and I use whenever we dye our hair. It's impossible to get hair dye out of towels once it's in there, and we don't have plenty of nice towels to go around ruining.

I walk out of the bathroom, casting a glance down the hall towards where the guys are sitting. They are still there watching the television as I walk into my room and get dressed for work, wearing a long sleeve shirt under my uniform shirt. I can feel the wet tips of my hair soaking through my two shirts and I don't really have enough time to blow dry it.

The reason I have to wear two shirts is that my boss doesn't like my body art and insists that I hide my tattoos with a long sleeve. I do, just to avoid problems. Half of the time though, my sleeves are rolled up because he's never around to see it. He also doesn't like my piercings but there is nothing I can do about that. The customers don't seem to mind, I've been asked to explain the meanings of my ink so many times and usually have people sticking around or coming back. My appearance even attracts herds of near-by college students for lunch, so he should be grateful.

I sneak past them, tip toeing carefully though I'm not sure why. They always come with me in the mornings, so it's not like I wanted to leave without them noticing. I stop at the door and just stare at them for a few minutes waiting to see if they'd notice. It's not very surprising that they don't notice me, I mean, they are all huddled over Demyx's cell phone, pointing and talking about something.

"Kay, I'm heading out…who's coming for breakfast?" I shout, tugging open the door and slipping on my sneakers, Demyx shoots up and Riku scrambles to his feet as well, Zexion as always gets up a lot calmer than the two nut jobs.

"I'm starved!" Demyx whines as he grips Zexion's hand and walks out the door, shoving me out of the way as I slip my wayfarer sunglasses on. My eyes are always super sensitive to the light after staying awake for a long amount of time. Riku hands me a tiny baggie of coke and smiles that bright, handsome smile of his.

"You'll need this to make it through your shift," he says and pats his pockets looking for keys, finding them he smirks triumphantly.

"I'm going to go do a run after breakfast, and then I'll meet you at the café for lunch," he says as we walk out and he locks the door, I nod my head as we walk out together.

"So, what do you think about the twins being back in town?" I ask, placing a cigarette between my lips and keeping step with Riku as he slides on his aviator glasses and ties his hair back and away from his face. He looks so amazing, the sunlight washing over his tanned, perfect skin, his hair so fucking shinny that I sort of stare at him from the corner of my eye, soaking in his appearance. I know whoever else is around is probably staring at him too.

I wish that I was as attractive as him, but instead I'm this awkwardly proportioned bean pole. My hands are too big and my hips too wide, I have a long skinny neck and a pointed chin, and let's not forget my rather…_large_ ears. I'm not the best looking guy out there, the only thing people constantly compliment me on are my eyes and hair, which is about it. Other than that, I've got diddly-squat going for me.

"Well, I never talked to 'em much outside of deals, you know? They seemed pretty cool though. Hopefully we'll see 'em around Red Label, rock their world," Riku smirks as he pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and checks the time. It's 8:10 am and we're getting closer to the café.

"What possessed you to work in a café?" Riku asks after I stay quiet. I blow smoke in his direction with a scowl on my face. He knows just how much I hate working in that stupid little café, yet he always makes fun of me for it.

"It's close to home, plus I don't have to pay for whatever I eat," I say with a shrug and we turn, entering the little corner café with a ding of the doorbell. It's pretty empty, except for Demyx and Zexion, who've already found a booth and are sitting down waving Riku over. I slide over the counter and rip my apron off the hangers, slipping it over my head and tying my hair back. It air-dried which means it's currently sticking up in every direction. I brush a few bangs away from my face and stare with immense boredom towards the door. I shoot a look towards the guys and they wave, smiling brightly.

"Oh, Baristaa!" Demyx shouts, laughing crazily along with Riku. Zexion just chuckling quietly to himself as Demyx sways around on the cushiony couch. I glare angrily and flip him the bird, smirking when he frowns.

"Come take our order!" He screams a little louder than necessary and I mouth 'fuck off' with a smirk and turn my head away to play with my lip studs. He gets up and stomps over to me, placing his hands on his hips when he stops in front of the counter, directly in my line of vision. I stare at his Led Zeppelin T-shirt, the falling angel on the front has my eyes glued to his chest and he clears his throat making me look up with a crazed smile, he giggles.

"What can I get you guys today?" I ask with a false cheerful tone, pulling on one of the tiny silver balls under my bottom lip and batting my eyelashes. I always try a different Barista persona whenever I'm in charge of the cashier (which I always am) and Demyx laughs before he looks up at the menu. I know exactly what he's going to get though. One strawberry banana smoothie with a Boston Crème donut, Zexion's going to get black coffee, that's it, and Riku is going to get Raspberry Iced Tea with two sugars and a slice of banana bread with some melted butter on top.

"Ah shut the hell up Axel, you know exactly what we want!" Riku calls from his seat and I send him a wink just as the doorbells chime signaling the arrival of a new customer. I look at them over Demyx's shoulder, and right away, I smirk seeing Xigbar walking towards us.

"I knew I'd find all you bitches here," Xigbar says with a laugh, and I roll my eyes turning as Demyx tells him to go fuck something dead and rotting. That is more than a little disgusting but I won't tell Demyx that, and that's probably because it's just Xigbar he's saying it to. I mean…I don't really give a fuck. Xigbar's one nasty fucker, he can take it, I'm sure. It's not like Demyx was saying that to a baby, then I'd think any normal human being would tell him to tone it down. Or maybe they'd knock his lights out because really, why would you say that to a child?

Anyway, I throw the whole banana into the blender, because it's Demyx and because it's going in the fucking _blender_, what difference does it make if I chop it up or not? The strawberries are tossed in next, turning the banana and the milk a soft pink colour. Everything's just thrown on top of a mountain of ice cubes. I leave that once it's done (or as done as it's gonna be) and skip over to the coffee machines, preparing the stupid filter and everything before finally starting the coffee. Riku's tea is next. I never asked them why they all have to get a completely different beverage, but if you look at each drink…It matches them perfectly.

Black Coffee for Zexion who probably thinks his soul is black, when he sees a window he wants it painted black, no colours anymore, he wants them to turn black. Na na na na na na, na na na nanana, guitar solo!

Demyx get a strawberry banana smoothie because it just _does not_ get any gayer than that. I mean, it's pink and really sweet. Plus, don't only girls drink smoothies?

And Riku gets raspberry tea because it's slightly bitter, so it's not a fully queer drink but it's still pink and fucking faggy just like him.

All the while, I listen to Demyx talking to Xigbar. Apparently, if my eaves dropping doesn't fail me, there is an awesome party tonight after our show at the Red Label. Xigbar prattles on, telling Demyx how we're all invited because the owner of the house definitely wants us there because apparently (I say apparently way too much) we are his favorite band or something. I turn, grabbing a glass and start making Riku's faggetty, fag iced tea (I need to stop making fun of faggots when I'm such a huge one myself).

"Where's this party at?" I throw a straw into Riku's tea just because I know he hates them, I make it pink just to grind on his nerves a little extra. I've told him about my thoughts on his drink, earned me a nice black eye.

"Hayner's house, he's having a welcome party for some little shits," Xigbar says, taking a few packets of sugar that are sitting on the counter. I don't ask why he wants them because this is Xigbar, asking him a question is like throwing a penny into a well, you'll never get anything out of it. "Apparently his best friend is back in town and he wants to show him how this side of the city parties," he continues, smirking at me when I raise an eyebrow at him. How we party, in other words is simply mountains of drugs, enough alcohol to bring down Attila the Hun and way too many people crammed into someone's house listening to whatever CDs we can find thrown around on the floor by the stereo. Or I usually end up singing on the porch.

Hayner, I roll the name around in my head, searching the vast sea of faces and finally finding one that matches. He's this horny as fuck college kid that's always at the Red Label, he lives off his parents who are never home because they're big shot lawyers. Which is why when he throws a party, you'll find every teenager and adult within a ten mile radius crammed into his mini mansion. He also buys a fucking 8-ball from Riku every Friday.

"Fuckin' hell. Axel make my tea to-go. This fucking custy is blazing down my cell phone," Riku grumbles walking over to the counter and I grab the cup I put his tea in, and pour it into a paper cup. I think Iced Tea tastes disgusting in a paper cup. I also think tea in general is disgusting, but Riku has no taste buds or something because he doesn't care about how _anything_ tastes. Maybe that's why he doesn't realize the absolutely horrendous flavor of coke.

I shove the straw into his cup and he watches me with a glare, I hand him his cup with a smile.

"See you at the party!" I call as Riku walks away sipping from the pink straw; he lifts his hand and sends me the finger as he disappears behind two executives who're walking into the café. I sigh and roll down my sleeves. You can just tell these guys are pricks and definitely not into tattoos, they're probably the type of guys who'll give their kids shit for having more than two earrings in at the same time. I scrunch my nose in distaste as they stare down Xigbar and Demyx. They aren't particularly giving them the look-at-those-nice-kids stare either and the tension is getting so thick you could cut it with a knife. I just know Xiggy is dying to start a fight but is holding back because, hello, I fucking work here.

I send the two douche-bags a look, leaning towards them on the counter and eyeing them in a certain way I just know will make them feel uncomfortable.

I feel like acting like an 80's waitress, so I pop my gum and cock my hip out with a bored expression on my face. They just watch me and I roll my eyes skyward, perfecting the bored-old-waitress-in-a-diner look.

"What can I get you sugah?" I say and watch them send each other a look before they order tentatively.

I love my job.

* * *

**A/N: **A little side note:  
Each chapter will alternate. This chapter is in Axel's perspective, the next shall be in Roxas'.

Special thanks to a jolly old friend, _PinkFloydLady7_, for convincing me to post this.

Hope you all liked it. Let me know if it's worth a shot at continuing.


	2. Paradise City

**Break Night**

Chapter II : Paradise City  
_Roxas Fedorov_

"Well, you've got the job Roxas." Man, this guy sounds like he belongs in a James Bond movie and totally looks like he belongs in one too. What with his accent, swagger, fancy suite and all. He's so British I can almost taste the tea and biscuits on the fancy estate's lawn furniture and I can totally see him playing Crocket.

My brain decides to play back Sora telling me not to be so stereotypical, nagging me about how I'm always judging people or something without getting to know them first. But I honestly don't give a fuck about stereotyping, or judging people. I do it to everyone, so it's not like I'm racist or anything, I'm just mean sometimes, but I'm equally mean to everyone. It's a bad habit I know, but bad habits die hard. All I honestly know about Brits is what Hollywood has taught me, now if that's all shit, I'm not to blame. The movies taught me that all of 'em like tea, have that accent and live in the section of Europe where it's foggy all the time. Now, if my teaching was incorrect, again, blame Hollywood. If Sora knows more than that (the actual truth, perhaps?) good for him and his trips to London. I never even asked him to share his bountiful British knowledge with me anyhow.

I feel like doing a fist pump when I register that Ol'Britty said I got the job, but I hold it back and I smile at the owner (Luxor or something…But isn't that a casino or is it a space alien?). Instead of outdated dances though, I stand up at the same time as him for the traditional handshake, because it's what's appropriate for men of my age. He sticks his hand out and I grab it, giving it a nice, firm shake because everyone knows a man is judged on how hard he can hold another man's hand. It's been like that since prehistoric times I'm sure, or since handshakes became a way of greeting.

"I look forward to seeing you," he says as I make my way to the door and I grin at him, tugging the heavy steel thing open, and trying to shimmy my way out without being caught in between. Sort of like a thief sneaking out of a vault or an adventurer avoiding booby traps, only without high tech gadgets and acrobatic moves. I swear I have to use a lot of my leg strength ("pull with your legs, not your back!") like a body builder to open the damn thing; it's just that fucking heavy. It's probably made of reinforced titanium to keep the druggies and alchies out of ol'Luxy's office when bar fights break loose. I wonder if anyone has ever tried to break in, I mean, you don't just have a heavy door like that for no reason. Maybe he's got some enemies who want his head, or maybe the crowd is just that rowdy. I guess I'll find out next week or whenever I start.

With a wave to the bouncer I'm out of the dark club and into the slowly fading day light. I start patting my pockets, looking for my iPod, so that I'd be able to listen to some music. I find it and with a burst of excitement slide my big headphones onto my head. I can't wait to see what my iPod randomly plays for me. I decide that now is the perfect time to spark the joint in my pocket, mostly because I've got some awesome music. I've been thinking about it since I rolled it with the dime I got from Hayner last night. I know Sora will be pissed when I get home stoned, but…Oh well.

_"Take me down to the paradise city__, where the grass is green and the girls are pretty. Take me home, oh, won't you please take me home!"_

I take a drag and smile hazily to no one in particular; I couldn't have picked a better song myself. There are a lot of people swarming the downtown streets, especially this strip, seeing as a few good clubs are located here, or so it seems. No one, however even casts a glance at me as I smoke up. I love this city.

With a look both ways, I deem it safe to walk towards my street car stop. As I smoke near the bus shelter (Sadly my joint's disappearing fast) it finally sinks in. I got a fucking job. I'm going to be a bartender at The Red Label. It's apparently the hottest club in town with live bands and mosh pits and everything a boy like me dreamt of in his childhood. Actually, a boy like me _should_ have dreamt of becoming a doctor and my father would have loved it because that'd be a good Fedorov career. But too bad Daddy-o, I'm a bartender. It's just a shame I didn't find any gay strip clubs to tend. I mean, that would really drive the last nail into my father's metaphorical coffin. If it wasn't painfully obvious, my father and I don't get along.

My crackpot father decided to ship Sora and me off after high school (I'm guessing it was partially my fault, seeing as I was _'out of control'_), he wanted us to go to a good college, or at least that's what he said. I know the truth is that he just wanted me out of this place and far from all my bad influences. However, as fate and my rebellious spirit would have it, I never attended and instead I snuck away and learned how to bartend. Making a few shady friends in the city's underground in the process. My dad never knew that I was usually the one influencing people, not the other way around. Sora took his time in all those gay ass Art classes; though I'm convinced he just signed up to smell the paint-thinner fumes. He calls it Abstract; I call it a complete waste of paint.

My dad, of course, was furious when the college informed him that I was no longer enrolled in their program (the polite, wealthy way of saying _"he's been kicked out"_). Dear Old Papa wanted me to come back _immediately_ (as if he could control me) but I stayed a while longer because I do whatever the hell I want, and no old man's gonna tell me how to live my life. When I was good and ready, I came back, dragged Sora back too because Lord knows he can't be anywhere unless I'm there.

I sort of really want him to get laid and get the fuck off my case, loosen up a little even. He's such a damned cock block it's painful to a certain extent. I mean, when you have a raging hard on while wearing really tight pants and suddenly your brother shows us and drags you home with said hard on still raging…It's painful. Then again, he's Sora and I have no idea where I'd be without my younger brother, he may be a pain but I love him just the same. Maybe it's because he reins me in when I get a little out of control. You know, ties me to the post in the corral for three days without food or water, tries to break me (or talk some sense into me) when the punishments done but I just don't learn. Thus, this process repeats and Sora's the only one with enough patience (and faith) to deal with me.

_"Rags to riches or so they say. You gotta keep pushin' for the fortune and fame. You know it's, it's all a gamble. When it's just a game, you treat it like a capitol crime. Everybody's doin' their time."_

I've been back in my old city for around a month now, and it's still the exact same, only the kids've grown up and the babies have become kids, rowdy and teetering on insane. I used to love this place when I was in high school, mostly because of the night life. The thrill of sneaking out or just plain walking out on my parents and going to get so high, I'd swear by my life that Drew Barrymore was my biological father (until someone would tell me, _"he's actually a she"_).

The amount of shit you can get into on these streets is enough to make your head spin, with your choice of looking like the Exorcist or an owl. Here on these dark by night, barely-passing-as-family-friendly by day streets, you can get anything and everything. Especially if you know people and believe you me, I know people. I have Hayner for one (whom I can thank for this joint), and he's been my best friend since diaper days. He's insane and in a twisted romance with drugs, which is good for me because I can get them from _him_ for free. It says so in the unwritten laws of Best Friend hood.

It used to be that way all through out middle school and high school. He'd steal his grandma's painkillers or his brother's pot and we'd have the time of our lives behind the dumpster in our middle school parking lot. What we did I can never tell you. It's not like I swore an oath to secrecy, it's just I can't even remember for my _own_ sake.

Well, our dumpster days lasted until we entered high school and Hayner found real dealers or some people that would get us _"you know man, the stuff"._ Two people I remember were named Ricky and Alex or something. They'd get us blow and were incredibly hot, sadly I couldn't tell which way they went so I never tried. Then there was this other guy, his name escapes me but his hair is something I'll remember him by till the day I die. He will never go into Memory Limbo (where I assume all our lost memories go), floating eternally with the memories of dumpster days and what my mother's mother looked like. It was a mullet, a god damned _mullet_ and no one has those anymore, there's no way I'd forget him. Plus, he'd get us the fucking dopest dope you could ever smoke.

It's just a shame I don't remember their names (properly) and I know I can't ask Hayner because he's so brain dead I'm surprised he remembers his own name. Getting those drugs again would really welcome me back home.

_"I want to see__. Boy, I'm gonna be mean. Oh, oh take me home!"_

I've missed this place. There's just so many memories and good things at your finger tips. You can never go wrong here, or well _you can_ but you'll have a kick ass time doing it. Unless you involve the cops, those fuckers will fuck up everything. I should know, I got a fucking pig in my family. Cloud. He's such a bastard and he doesn't even talk to me, could you imagine how much I'd hate him if he actually would?

Anyway, I'm glad Hayner's having this little shindig for me because I've been gone for a while. Streets change like river water and I'll need to get reacquainted with the people and the shit that's going down. That way, the owners of apartments, a.k.a After-Hours, will allow me entry without question.

I toss the roach onto the floor and grind it with the tip of my sneaker. I don't know why I do it, but I always do. Just as the song ends, my phone begins to squeal in my pocket. Some wicked, awesome guitar solo crying out like a banshee and I can see a few people looking at me, I can feel my fingers itching for a fight but well, I have a call to take so I ignore their stares. One dude though, is giving me the traditional 'rock on' symbol and I give him a curt little head bang because he deserves it, the head bang slips the head phones off my head. "Hello?"

"Roxas! Where in the bloody hell are you?" Ah, Hayner, my old buddy, old pal. He's still in college, which really, is probably the funniest thing I've ever heard but I guess you'd have to know Hayner to know why it's so funny. I can try to explain but it probably won't have the same effect.

The only reason he's doing it—college I mean— is because as long as he stays in school, his parents are going to give him money and he won't have to work. I'm not sure what he's studying and when you ask him all he does is give you this hazy little grin and says _"I'm undecided"_. All I can think is, fucker you've been undecided for three damned years, make up your fucking mind. Then I remember this is _Hayner_ and he's probably lost his mind and is so far gone he forgets what he wants to do with his life the minute he's sober enough to decide.

"I am walkin' downtown good sir," I say with a chuckle because I never give straight answers to questions and the chuckle is because I'm really high. I usually give very vague responses and let people use their dusty imaginations. I am in that way, an artist. Arrr-teest. Arrrr-teest. That's a fucked up word.

Anyway, I figure if people want to know what I'm really doing, down to the last detail, they'll have to figure it out on their own. Why? Just because.

"What for?" He takes a long time to ask and I know he was thinking really hard about what to ask next. I always make people think hard about what they want to ask me, it's entertaining to say the least. Asking me questions is like getting wishes from a genie. You have to be careful and use them wisely. Man, I am about to go on a philosophical role.

I scratch my chin while I think about how to respond to his question. The feeling of facial hair makes me itch worse and I scowl. I fucking hate facial hair; it makes me look strange and excessively scruffy for my tastes. I prefer a nice clean shave to show off my nice skin, though some say it ticks years off me and the problem of being carded becomes a daily occurrence. I have patience though, so for the sake of aesthetics, I endure the ritual _"May I see some I.D, sir?"_ I quickly decide that once I get to the apartment, I'm going to do something about this itchy hair and probably have a shower, Lord knows I need one. I scratch my chin a bit more before actually answering Hayner. If I take any longer, he'll probably forget what he was asking in the first place.

"I got a job," I won't tell him what, because I know he'll find out. The only reason I found out about The Red Label was that Hayner told me it's his favorite spot, he told me it's probably everyone who's anyone's favorite and I had to check it out.

I was impressed to say the least. It's got this nice big open space for a dance floor (What type of dancing, is up to you), a nice stage with a retractable chain link fence hanging up above everyone's heads. You know, just in case people get a little crazy and start whipping their bottles at the bands performing. It's optional for the bands. Some don't even want it. Those dark metal bands will probably just eat the glass thrown at them anyway, so they don't need protection.

The club's entire colour scheme is red, black and silver. The chairs and tables are silver, the seats have zebra print (I doubt anyone uses them, unless they dump their passed out friends on them). The walls are black and the floor is blood red. The bar is pretty nice too, and I can easily picture myself in there, tending to people and getting them completely fucked up. I can make some pretty potent shit if I do say so myself and I totally fucking say so.

"Seriously? Why?" I make my way closer to where the streetcar will probably stop and just stand there, holding the phone against my head and not really understanding exactly what Hayner just asked. Did he ask me why I got a job? Really? I thought it was common knowledge why people work.

"Money," I say and watch as the heavy Streetcar lugs its way up the tracks towards me, stopping traffic as it screeches to a halt. I hear Hayner curse because he heard the loud metal-against-metal sound and it probably beat on his hung-over brain like a drum. I climb aboard and toss in 3 fucking dollars. The price got hiked way up since I was last here; I remember when adults only paid 2 dollars. Now, you're probably thinking it's not a lot but it is. They go up in increments of 25 cents, so for it to go up a whole dollar, is quite the feat.

"Dude, your dad is _the_ real-estate God of the GTA, why do you need money? And you're totally baked right now, aren't you? You only talk all elusive when you're baked!" Hayner's funny. Not only does he think that just because half of the people in our graduating class live off their parents, I'm gonna do the same thing but he tried to pin my clever mind tricks on pot…Okay, so maybe I only do it when I'm high but that's besides the point. Back to my father and why I need money.

Hayner must have forgotten that my father hates me and was a hairs breath away from disowning me if it hadn't of been for my mother. I told the fat bastard to go ahead, but my mother cursed and cried until he took back his words. I knew he'd never have the balls to upset my mother. The woman could bring the end of the world with just her eyes tearing up. No one could be able to hurt her; she's just too damned nice. I on the other hand am immune to her tears and her sobs; I can take them and not feel a hint of guilt unlike everyone else in the Fedorov family. Maybe it's because I know they're all fake tears.

"He tried to run me over that Christmas. You think he'll be paying for anything of mine? And yes, I am fucking baked." It's true you know, my father really did try to run me over and it was fucking ridiculous. I couldn't believe it but I didn't have much time to stop and ponder. I was sort of busy running for my fucking life.

"Oh yeaa_aaah_!" he says and I just chuckle, pulling the little yellow chord and moving to stand and get off the streetcar.

People here are crazy to say the least, especially the ones traveling on the Public Transportation System (from this point on, I'm going to call it the TTC). You can find any type of person riding the TTC, from people who talk to themselves, to the one's that will talk to you as if you know them. It's as entertaining as it is creepy and obnoxious. I say this because there is a woman speaking to a blue blanket as if it was a child. There are just some levels of crazy you'll never get used to.

"He's still not over you being queer huh?" I wish the entire world shared Hayner's brain. I swear everything would be a lot easier if everyone just saw everything as no problem at all. I think people would be able to live longer, healthier lives if they simply over looked things as easily as Hayner does, or found easier ways to solve their issues, like playing some damned game. I mean, he can fight for his life if he has to, or if provoked but he's usually too busy getting ruined to start anything and if there is a dispute, he tried to find different ways to solve it before resorting to fists. Like playing this stupid sport called Struggle to settle the score of anything. He's always played it, from when we were kids. 

I remember coming out to him and my other two friends. They just stared at me with blood-shot eyes before Hayner started laughing, smoke pouring out of his mouth and nose. It eventually ended in him choking on smoke and Olette having to beat his back until he could breathe. After the initial panic of Hayner dying wore off, they all looked at me (they being Hayner, Pence and Olette). Olette, The voice of smartness and the like spoke first, telling me she was cool with it. Pence nodded, and that arm that was always firmly along Olette's shoulders loosened up just a little bit because now he had one less guy to worry about.

Hayner had thought I was joking for a while and when he realized I wasn't, he was completely cool with it. He even helped me beat a few guys into near-comas for making a jab at my faggitude (his word, not mine). That landed us a few nights in the drunk-tank at the police station, mostly because every time we'd fight someone, we were shit faced.

Sadly, barely anyone shares his mind frame and thus the world is in complete chaos with people dying left, right and center. I don't know if it would really be a good thing though. I mean, if people were like Hayner, no one would care about anything or they'd all be beating each other with foam bats and let's face it, someone has to fucking care and sometimes foam bats just don't cut it. If no one cared, our world would be in even worse condition than it is now. Not to mention it would probably be over crowded with all the fucking the Hayner-clones would be doing. You know, I think it's better there's only one Hayner. It's safer too.

The streetcar screeches to a halt and I have to hurry out before the doors slam shut in my face. I hate how they leave you in the middle of the damn street. I remember that I have to answer Hayner before he falls asleep. "Naw man, he's still not over it," Hayner laughs loudly (I'm surprised he was still paying attention to the conversation) and I just shake my head, quickly making my way across the street before any cars come and mush me into the pavement.

Jaywalking is really a stupid crime, I mean, it's not stupid for people who do it, it's just stupid in the sense that…why the hell is it a crime? Really, I can think of things a helluva lot worse than Jaywalking that aren't treated as damned severely. Just…not right now because Sora's standing on the stairs of my apartment building and he looks beyond angry. "Dude, I'll call you later, Sora's gonna castrate me," Hayner goes into hysterics now and chuckles his goodbye, wishing my threatened balls and me luck. I pocket my phone and wave as Sora crosses his arms over his chest.

"Sup bro?" I say with a little smile, praying to God the darkness of early night fall hides my blood shot eyes. Sora just shakes his head with his foot tapping a quick little beat on the stairs. I know that look, it's exactly like my mother's and it just screams disappointment or something akin to it. I just don't know why he's so upset …until I see the boxes he's standing beside and I bite my bottom lip, eyes widening when I realize that today was the day our things from the dorms were being shipped over. I was supposed to help move everything upstairs to the fourth floor but instead I took to waltzing around downtown…but I did get my job so, half of what I did was important. However, I left the house 3 hours before the interview, but that isn't the point.

"Don't _'sup bro'_ me Roxas, where have you been? I told you the stuff was coming today yet you leave, I had to lug the boxes up on my own because Naminé and Kairi aren't here and you know that! Where the hell were you and what took you so long to come back? Honestly Roxas, are you going to start these disappearing acts again, really? God, you reek…have you been smoking? When we finish this, you're going to shower." I blink a few times because dammit, Sora has a set of lungs on him. He really does but that's probably because he took vocal classes when we were younger and they teach you how to expand your lungs or something. I'm pretty sure he's told me about it, I just forget.

What he means with _'these disappearing acts' _is that a few years ago, I took to leaving at any hour and coming back hours later, either shit faced or high, or both. He'd ask me for hours where I had gone and I'd do nothing but stare at him, telling him stories about creatures I had fought in the darkness. It was because they wanted my heart and I had to protect it because without it I'd become this thing called a Nobody (don't ask me what the fuck any of that means, I was tripping shit). I even told him I used my key as this amazing sword and he'd just listen, nodding his head without really interrupting me. He's cool like that.

Sora does drugs (mostly pot) and he drinks but he's just way more into his schooling and less badass than I am. What I mean by that is, in reality, he barely does any of those things, and when he does do them, he's with me. My dad would have a field day if he ever found out..

"I'll help with the last of it!" I offer lamely and Sora just shakes his head, staring at me with those blue eyes that just sometimes, creep me out. He bends over quickly and gets one of the few boxes left. I follow his example, picking up a box and shuffling into the building behind him. This is actually a lot harder than he made it seem. The box is fucking slipping…shit…shit…I quickly adjust my grip and clutch the box closer to my body, quickening my pace because I know Sora isn't going to hold the door for me. I can hear him puffing harshly through his nose while he carries the box up the stairs. I don't blame him though; these boxes are fucking heavy shit. I'm panting like a fucking dog. I wonder just what he put in them until I remember that some are mine, and they are probably filled with bongs and CD's. I packed my boxes completely high so I'm not too sure where anything is or what I put in them, all I know is that the boxes that are biggest are mine.

Finally we reach Naminé and Kairi's apartment and I hurry in, dropping the box with a clatter and a thump before tossing myself onto the leather sofa, my body is so tired. Sora places his box down and wipes his forehead before slowly dragging it towards the door of his room. I notice there are a lot of boxes up here, and some are already opened, a few objects have been clearly put away. Part of me gets ready to jump and make sure Sora hasn't touched anything that belongs to me, because I just don't like people going through my stuff but I relax when I see a pile of boxes in the hallway near my room. Those are clearly mine and they are all sealed.

Sora begins walking towards the door, my cue to get up and hurry downstairs for the rest of the boxes.

The lobby of Nami's apartment isn't so bad. It's spacey and has a little desk where a man keeps packages that don't fit in your mail box for you when you're away. I would never need to live in a building like this because I don't get packages or anything of the sort. I'm sure Naminé and Kairi order a lot of shit online or whatever though. The people are really nice too, mostly old retired folks because only they can pay for these places. Well, my Aunt and Uncle can pay for their two precious little girls to live in such a nice place too, so they don't have to worry about the TTC crazies. I just don't know if they know Sora and me are crashing here, they aren't very fond of me. I don't think my dad would be too happy about it either. My mom would probably want us to stay at home. No way in hell. I've lived with my father enough and I plan to never have to go back, never ever. I can just hear him already, _"So you've come crawling back, hm, Roxas?"_ Honestly, I'd rather live on the fucking street with no newspapers to sleep on.

I grab the next box and hear something crack when I almost topple off to the side and end up smacking into the wall instead of walking in through the door. I start laughing hysterically and I don't know why but I find myself wobbling all over the place and missing the door very funny. Well, I do know why but I really hope Sora doesn't. Sora sends me a harsh look and I smile sheepishly trying to shield my bloodshot eyes from his sharp shooter vision. My brother however isn't soothed by my little smile and storms over to me, opening the top flaps of the box (almost smacking my face with them) and looking inside.

"Roxas, what did you break? Can you please be careful! I have important stuff in some of these…" His scowl is enough to let me know he is beyond unhappy. The next thing I know I have a picture frame shoved in my face, little pieces of glass almost cutting my skin. I screech and try to jump back but I have the box so that doesn't really work. I hit the wall again and Sora grabs my arm to steady me with his free hand. My god, since when is my balance so bad?

"You ruined the picture of us together!" He growls and I just sort of stare at him or try to, I mean, I have a picture shoved too close to my face to focus on anything but the blurry image of me and Sora on a beach. It's a bad picture; I was hung over and about to puke, while Sora had his arm around me smiling. I was trying to smile but ended up looking like I had to shit. Sora loves the ugly thing. The picture isn't ruined though so I don't know what he's talking about. Only the frame is ruined and those things cost what, like five dollars at a variety store? I don't know why he's even making a fuss. Sora can be such a girl about things sometimes. I'm about to tell him this when he grabs the box out of my arms and breezes past me and into the lobby. I stare at him, somewhat confused until I figure I should grab another box and try not to break anymore picture frames.

By the time all the boxes are upstairs, my arms feel like jelly and they are tripping me out. I sway them side to side, making them look like the tentacles of the Finding Nemo squid and giggle to myself while I sit on the sofa. They ache and I only lifted 4 boxes, I can only imagine how Sora feels. I don't even want to ask him about the party tonight and if he's coming. My brother doesn't seem to be in the greatest of moods right now and I watch as he opens a Wine Cooler and starts sipping on it at the kitchen table. He's rubbing his temple like a tired parent and I can't help but think there's a speech coming. I mean, with the look on his face, all tired, frustrated angles and a deep crease across his forehead, one can only assume he's going to lecture me about maturity or something. We all know the look; every parent has given it to each and everyone of us at least once. I lost count of how many times I've seen it.

"Roxas," Oh, I told you! "I know we're back, and all your little friends are excited and you are too but please. Please, don't start acting up again and disappearing. You really need to cut back on the drugs and focus." My brother looks tired and a lot older than his 21 years. I scoff and toss my head back onto the couch, looking at him upside down. "I'm serious Roxas! What are you going to do for the rest of your life? Smoke weed and get shit faced? That's not exactly the greatest way to live…plus on that road you'll probably not even make it to 26. Roxas, just listen to me for once, please."

"Sora please, I am focused. I already got a job and everything. You worry too much," I smile at him, squinting my eyes because it used to make him laugh when we were younger. He'd say I looked Japanese, which is weird considering we're of Russian decent and I'd chase him around, threatening to eat him with my chopsticks. We were kids, so, it's not as weird as it sounds. Kids laugh at the stupidest things. He breaks out into a grin and I realize it still has the same effect, though I know I'm not going to start chasing him. I probably would if I didn't feel like collapsing.

He comes and sits beside me, but quickly scowls and moves away. I look at him in confusion because, what the hell?

"Roxas, go shower. You reek." He plugs his nose and shoos me with his hand. I feel highly offended but with a puff I stand and remember my itchy facial hair and over all greasy-ness. Sora always smells really good, but that's because he has time to shower. I usually forget, like I did right now, which means I can go a while without showering if no one reminds me. Sora is here for that very reason, to remind me when to shower. He's like the part of my brain I'm missing. Rationality, or maturity, or maybe he's both. "We'll continue this talk when you get back," He says to me when I disappear down the hall and into the bathroom.

Naminé and Kairi's bathroom is fucking freezing all the time, but that's because Naminé loves the cold. The stark white bathroom reminds me of an asylum or something. The walls are whiter than bleached bone, and the floor is the same. Actually, everything is the same exact shade of white and that's a very large indication that Naminé decorated this section of the apartment. I remember asking her why everything she owns is white, and all she did was giggle and ruffle my hair.

It's probably because it trips her out or something. I know it's tripping me out seriously right now. Everything is just melting into each other and it all looks connected. I stumble to the bathtub and turn on the shower, pealing my clothes off faster than the speed of light and jumping under the boiling spray. It feels so damned good on my skin and I feel the layers of dirt simply sliding off and down the drain.

I don't have much time to really enjoy my shower because I want to be out by the time Kairi and Naminé get back, that way if they've heard about the party we can all head out. I scrub myself quickly, shampoo falling into my eyes and I scream loudly because it feels like my eyeballs are on fire.

God damn it, god damn it! I'm going to be blind, I just know it. I've lost all my fucking vision and my life is completely fucking ruined. Shit, this hurts worse than anything I've ever felt in my life.

I remember that I should really rinse the soap out of them then, and I do, relief washes over me when the water touches my eyes and takes the soap out. On the bright side, my eyes will smell good.

I'm done my shower relatively quickly and I step out turning to the mirror and grabbing my razor. Kairi suggested I wax my facial hair seeing as I hate it so much, but I don't have time. Maybe I'll take her up on that offer later on, but right now, I have to get rid of this nasty hair. I'm surprised I don't cut myself with the speed I'm shaving, but I'm guessing it's because of all the years of practice. It feels great to have a nice smooth face, and when I'm done I can't stop touching my chin and cheeks. It feels smoother than a baby's bottom…but…Ew, that's weird, never mind.

I don't want my face feeling like an ass, not even if it's a baby's. I grab my boxers and my old shirt and just throw it on after applying my deodorant that's kept in the medicine cabinet. I start kicking the rest of my clothes into the bathroom closet where the laundry goes and once it's all shoved in there, I close the door. The reason I'm wearing the same clothes is because I know I'll be changing out of them soon enough and plus, I didn't bring any other things into the bathroom with me.

I waltz out, steam pouting out after me and I make my way over to Sora who's still on the couch with his Wine Cooler. If that was me, I'd have at least ten of those things in front of me.

I drop down beside him and he smiles, handing me a Wine Cooler and I clink my bottle against his, taking a long gulp and smiling widely after I've swallowed. "That's much better. Now, promise to tone it down," he says with a tiny frown and I can't stand seeing it there. I sigh loudly and my head lolls to the side, letting me get a better look at his face.

"I'll tone it down as much as I can, no promises that it'll be what you want though." I smirk when he groans but he nods his head anyway. It might not seem like he accomplished anything but really, he has. I'll tone it down for a week or so, but after that I'll probably be right back at it. Still, considering who I am and my personality, getting me to tone it down for even a week is amazing. But only Sora can do that.

"Here's to coming home!" I sing-song and Sora shakes his head laughing, taking a sip of his own and nodding his head in agreement. I hear the door click open and the sounds of two girls struggling to open the door. I giggle the more I hear them struggle and Sora groans before getting up to open the door. He's probably wondering how he ever got stuck taking care of all of us.

My two cousin's tumble in as soon as Sora pulls the door back, Kairi's keys are still in the lock when she flops onto the entrance floor, Naminé tumbling over her and doing that little run people do when they are trying not to fall. She speeds up right before smacking into the dining room table. I burst out laughing, because they're both shit faced and it's only 7. Kairi's ass is up in the air and Naminé is just clinging to the table like it's a raft in the middle of the ocean.

"We're hooome!" Kairi howls from her place on the floor and Sora shuts the door, shaking his head.

"Yeah, I can see that," he answers and makes his way back over to the couch as the girls each try and steady themselves enough to move. Naminé is the first to accomplish this, while Kairi struggles to get up. Naminé smiles brightly at me and rushes over, jumping over the backrest of the couch and landing right beside me. Kairi rushes in after she's finally gotten control of her body with a war cry and tackles Sora, landing in his lap and taking his Wine Cooler.

"There's a party at Hayner's for you sexy little fiends! We've totally gotta go!" Kairi says around the bottle and Naminé nods excitedly. If there is a party, they will definitely be there and especially if it's for us. I smile, grateful that they brought up the party and I didn't have to. Little do they know I already knew about the party and they just opened up the opportunity for me to go without Sora frowning at me. He'll still complain, but at least it wasn't my idea. Naminé grabs my Wine Cooler and finishes it off, tossing it onto the table with a loud clatter. Sora frowns staring as a few drops spill onto the table.

"I'm not going to one of Hayner's parties, even if it's in our honor or whatever." Sora says with finality, somehow managing to slide away from Kairi and into the kitchen. Kairi sits there with a tiny pout on her lips, looking towards where Sora walked to. I laugh before patting her over to where I'm sitting with Naminé. She scoots over quickly, gulping down the rest of Sora's cooler.

"Convince him," she wines quietly in my ear and I nod my head, slipping away from the two girls on the couch, leaving them to their own devices and I'd rather not know what they are. I love my cousins to death but I know they're both equally fucked. Naminé is just plain weird, there is no denying it and Kairi is her sister. Weirdness is hereditary, so obviously the siblings are both insane. I can hear them chatting away drunkenly, and can't wait until I'm equally shit faced.

"So, why aren't you coming?" I ask from the door way, watching my brother gather ingredients and set them onto the counter. He looks up from grabbing a head of lettuce and shrugs his shoulders before grabbing a large knife and cutting the lettuce with one smooth slice.

"I have to unpack and cook dinner." I roll my eyes and walk over to my brother, gripping his hand softly, prying the knife away and setting the thing in the sink. Sora stands there looking at me with confusion on his face and I smile before gripping his shoulders and making him face me.

"You can do that tomorrow. Hayner always has food at his house. Come on So, this is our welcome back party!" I feel my face slowly going into a puppy pout and Sora notices a little too late. It's fully formed and he's gotten the full effect of the look. I usually don't brag (much) but I have the best fucking puppy dog pout in the history of puppy dog pouts. My eyes get all misty and my bottom lip trembles slightly. No one can resist. He groans and starts laughing, knowing he's going to give in, I tug him against my chest hugging him tightly. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I grin against his hair and he sighs, prying me off him and shaking his head.

Again there's that look like he's going to lecture me.

"Roxas I'm not going to be baby sitting you. Don't call me in the morning because you've wandered off with some ugly ass pig," He looks dead serious and I gasp dramatically, tossing my hand across my forehead.

"You'd let me sleep with someone less than a five!?" Sora leaves the kitchen then because he hates the way I judge people by numbers. He's one of those people that go for personality, while I'm more of an appearances-are-everything type of guy. I guess it's because of my bad judgmental habits. Kairi calls from her spot on the couch in a high pitched squeal of happiness.

"I know a sure ten Roxy, I'll introduce you two at the party!" I grin, my stomach flipping at the chance of meeting someone, especially someone Kairi deems as a ten. Anyone Kairi knows has hook ups, and that would be a perfect way to start my new life. With a hot, sexy dealer/booty call.

I hurry into the living room as the two girls are getting off the couch. Kairi signals me to follow her into their room and I hurry behind them, shooting Sora a look over my shoulder. My brother has a very boring appearance, always wearing cargo shorts with a damned polo shirt or something equally lame. Leaving the house with him is an embarrassment. The only things about him that are attention grabbing would be his hair and his eyes. His hair because it defies gravity, standing all over the place in this permanent bed-head look and his eyes because they are almost electric blue. If only he'd spice up his wardrobe, he'd look killer.

"You! Get ready! I don't want to see none of this…polo shirt shit!" Sometimes I wonder why my brother stands all my crap. I mean, he isn't obligated to follow me around, nor is he in charge of me. He doesn't have to take care of me or even hold my hair back when I'm puking my guts out. Yet he does it. Sometimes he's a cock block (most of the time) but I guess that's just him being a good brother. Maybe if I was a better brother, I'd take care of him too sometimes. I feel like I'm not lugging my weight in our brotherly bond, and I decide that tonight I will make sure Sora loosens up and has fun.

"So girls, what outfit am I wearing tonight?" I grin mischievously as Kairi squeals, rushing over to her wardrobe and pulling the large doors open. This is obviously why they wanted me to follow them, because they love dressing me up in whatever clothes they have. They've always loved dressing me up and I've always loved letting them.

I remember once when I was younger, probably around 10 or 11. They put a pink dress and make up on me. I felt pretty, I won't lie and we were having fun until my father came in. I have never been hit so hard in my life, and I'll never forget the sting of his belt. The click of a lighter catches my attention then, pushing my asshole father out of my mind and I turn to see Naminé sparking up a thick blunt. It smells strongly of blueberries and I smirk as she takes a long pull.

"Sora is going to freak," I say and the blonde girl just laughs, rolling her eyes as smoke crawls out of her nose, making her face seem like those statues that have water pouring out of them. The smoke looks like a waterfall, flowing gracefully down the dip of her upper lip. I smile as she offers me some, obviously I take it.

The first hit is like a punch to my throat and I start coughing, all the smoke escaping from wherever it can. My eyes water and my throat burns and I can already feel my head lightening right off my neck. It sort of feels like a balloon on a tiny string, slowly being filled with helium. I choke at the mental picture of me as a balloon while Kairi finally makes her way to me and starts patting my back. Naminé stays on the same stool just laughing crazily, damn sadistic little bitch.

I take another toke after my chest calms down and this one goes down much smoother. Seeing I'm not going to die, Kairi goes back to grabbing the clothes she thinks will get me laid tonight. When the redhead comes back, she plucks the blunt from my fingers, popping it in her mouth and motioning me towards her bathroom. The clothes thrown over her arm is all black and I grab it without too much question and walk into the bathroom.

I get undressed quickly, and when I say quickly I mean very damn fast. I can get undressed in less than 6 seconds. I've timed myself before and it was fucking hilarious watching Hayner try. It took him 3 minutes to take off his own pants. But I digress, back to the clothes Kairi gave me.

The first item is a black, corset like vest with various zippers strewn across the front and faint, gray pinstripes. I slip it on, zipping it up at the front and immediately feeling the corsetness of it…Corsetness isn't a word is it? Well, my point is it's tight around my waist, tugging everything inwards and making me seem shapelier than I actually am, like a corset. Satisfied with the way the vest is on, I turn and grab the pants. Just one look tells me I'm going to have to have some trouble slipping into them. Kairi is a very tiny girl, so all her clothes naturally are tiny.

I realize I'm going to have to tuck my damn cock between my legs if I want to get these things on, I'm so going to have to go commando. That's fine, as long as I don't get a hard on or anything I shouldn't experience any discomfort. "Kairi, I'm not wearing underwear!" I shout past the door and I hear her start to choke before she can call back.

"Gross! Just don't cum in my pants!"

I slip my boxers off and fold them neatly, placing them on top of the rest of my clothes then safely and neatly I tuck myself away. I tug the pants up and with one harsh pull they are over my thighs and around my hips. Buttoning them now is the problem. Sucking in my stomach I button them and with a gust of air I am finally in these pants. I realize just now how pointless sucking in my stomach was, it's not like it made my hips any smaller or anything. I've just seen so many people in movies doing that to button their pants, so I've always done it too, never realizing it doesn't work unless your pants actually go near your stomach.

The pants are extremely tight, looking almost like spandex stretched over my thin legs, accentuating the thinness of my two appendages while squeezing my cock right against me. It feels really weird, but to wear tight pants you have to tuck it back, unless you're a girl but that's obvious. Spotting a full length mirror I pivot and stare at myself, deeming myself ready after a quick once over, I gather my own clothes and walk out to find both the girls staring at the blunt. I swoop by and take it from them, taking a long pull and closing my eyes as I inhale the smoke.

"Oh my god Roxas! You look so hot in those! Here, let's set up your hair and _shiiiiit_!" Kairi jumps up, running or well, stumbling over to her vanity, gathering a black eyeliner pencil, a comb and hairspray, along with a silver studded belt that she tosses at me. I catch it, slipping it quickly through the loops. Once that's done, I throw myself onto the bed, exhaling a thick cloud of smoke as my cousin comes back and hovers over me.

"Close your eyes until I say so." I shut my eyes and try to remain completely still, well until I take another hit and she complains but waits for me to exhale. I wait for her to move to do it but when I see her stay there, I blow the smoke out. It's not my fault she's a dumbass and forgot to move. I hear her cough which must mean she inhaled all the smoke. I start laughing loudly, shaking the bed and Naminé joins in because she probably saw Kairi choking on the smoke. The redhead slaps my chest, my signal to shut up and I hear something whack against what I assume is Naminé.

When I'm finally calmed down Kairi gets to work. The tip of the pencil feels really cold on my eyelid and I have no idea why I've never noticed the texture of make up before. It feels really weird gliding over my skin and it seems like it takes forever for her to finally pull away. This is where I open my eyes and look at her. She's still moving back and when she's far enough, she does the little directors box with her fingers, changing the angles before Naminé gets up and stares at me with bloodshot eyes. I swear, half the time people are looking at me, it's with bloodshot eyes.

"Sexy." Naminé smirks and I chuckle around the blunt before Sora comes in and chokes on the heavy smoke in the room. He squints and I realize he actually got ready. His hair is brushed, though you can't really tell because it's standing up in every direction, but there's still a tiny difference. He has a light blue plaid shirt on with light blue, torn jeans and his navy converse. He looks adorable, especially with the awkward way he's just standing in the threshold of the room.

"Aw So!" I coo from the bed, I can see his blush from my place on the bed, before he shakes his head. He hates when I coo at him, something about him feeling like a baby or something. I never listen when he tells me not to do it though. It's part of being a big brother, and yes I consider myself the big brother just because I was born 5 minutes before Sora.

"Hayner just called, it's time to get going." I jump off the bed and never in my life have I run as fast as I just did. I was out in the hallway, slipping on my boots before Sora could even take a breath. Kairi cackles, slipping on her hot pink stilettos as Naminé follows, her white pumps in hand instead of on her feet. Sora comes out last, locking the apartment door and taking the blunt from me. He kills it with a few long, hard drags before tossing it into near by bushes. Blunts are like prostitutes, you get what you want from them, then you toss em away. I throw my arm over his shoulder and smile, feeling fuzzy and warm even if I was just thinking about prostitutes. Sora brushes me off with a laugh.

"Get off me you stoner," He grins as he opens the car door, I pout climbing into the passenger side and the girls get in just as Sora starts the car.

"Alright, so I've got a perfect ten for you Roxy! You better be ready," Kairi grins and I nod happily. Perfect tens are always good and when coming from Kairi I can already tell what this guys going to be like. Probably insane and smoking hot, as I clearly said before. Perfect ten.

"I've got one for you So," Naminé says in her quiet voice and my brother blushes furiously before shaking his head.

"No thanks. I'm just going to…_mingle_," Sora is so lame, I swear. There isn't much we can do about it though, except watch out for him when a pervert tries to sneak his way into my brother's innocent little life. That's when I'm a good brother. I will kill anyone who fucks with Sora.

Hayner doesn't live too far, but it's not in the heart of the city where Naminé and Kairi live. He lives in an actual neighborhood, surrounded by huge houses and fancy cars. My own parents live in a similar neighborhood, where Sora and I were raised and I couldn't explain my hate for the likes of that place even if I tried. It was always so damned boring, nothing but old married couples, or rich newly weds doing nothing but going on evening strolls. I was so damned bored growing up. Thank god that's all changed.

I can't wait to get to the party and meet this perfect ten.

God damn, is it ever good to be home, in my paradise city.

* * *

**A/N: **Alright, here we go!  
Chapter two of Break Night.

Here we meet a few of the other characters. Like Hayner, Kairi, Sora and Nami.  
But most importantly, we meet Roxas!

Let me know what you all think, I love hearing anything you guys have to say :]

A big thank you to everyone who Story Alerted/Favorited this!


	3. Anything Goes

**Break Night**

Chapter III: Anything Goes  
_Axel Steel_

"Axel fucking Steel!" I walk slowly towards Hayner, trying to maintain my balance as he slaps his hand against mine, pulling me towards him to pat my back. The world spins out of focus until I bump into Hayner's chest and the sidewalk sort of materializes underneath me again. I have no idea why, but mostly everyone I meet greets me like this. I think it's a show of status or well that's what I've been told. It's like, when they clap you on the back it means you're one of them or something, but I honestly don't know Hayner well enough to be welcomed into his little group of whatever he has. I just think it's good he likes me enough to hug me. I mean, I wouldn't hug me, I smell like fucking road kill but that's beside the point. Deciding I don't care who'd hug me or why as long as I get fucking touched, I pat his back in return enjoying the feel of his soft shirt under my finger tips. This is why I don't do Ecstasy too often. I mean, for fucking 6 hours straight I'm going to have this insatiable urge to rub against everything like a damn kitten. I'm really liking the way Hayner's hair tickles my cheek, and I sort of nuzzle into his spiky hair. He pulls away after it becomes apparent that our hug lasted just a bit more than normal and I grin at him. It's clear someone's been pre-gaming, if his dilated pupils are anything to do by, I just wonder what he's been hitting to look like _that_. But, it's not like I'm the perfect image of sobriety myself.

Hayner's a weird person, from what I know personally and from what I've heard. Not only is his over all appearance strange, I mean, how many blondes do you know that have brown eyes? But it's his everything that makes him a weirdo. Honestly though, his appearance is not what makes him weird, well partially it's his big brown eyes and seemingly never ending supply of camo. Honestly, I think he owns at least half the world's supply of camouflage clothes. Where can you possibly buy all that? I've never seen so much army pattern in my life. I only have one pair of pants like that, one, and it took me years to find them. But in all seriousness, what really makes him weird is the fact that he likes to beat people with blue, foam bats. I remember my first time meeting him way back when, in high school. It was not only awkward for me because I was completely out of it, but also because he came at me with a giant blue fucking bat. To say I freaked out would be an understatement.

It was the first time he bought off Riku, and clearly I was going to be there. Riku's never sold to a new custy alone. Whenever he gets some new people to sell to, I go with him the first time. It's sort of like a parent going with their child to school. The kid knows what school is and what he has to do, but the parent is there on the first day of every grade, you know, just because. Anyway, that's when I first met one of the twins, the blonde one. He trailed out after Hayner attacked me with the bat and I swear, I've never gotten a hard-on faster in my entire life. Not because of the bat though, that would just be awfully weird but because just one look at the blonde and I was completely entranced. I totally forgot about my huge freak-out, where I almost bit a chunk out of Hayner's arm, and stared at him. He didn't notice me though because as soon as Hayner paid, Riku tugged me away and they went to get fucking ripped. And Riku and I went to do the same.

Now, tonight is the night we'll meet again. For real this time though, I'm actually going to talk to him and if I'm not too fucked up maybe I'll get lucky. I'll admit I'm sort of excited and never before have I felt this way just because I know I might be fucking someone. I just hope he's here, I mean after all, this party is for the twins. I'm hoping they'll be here or else all this E I popped will be good for nothing. Or maybe it won't...I gotta see who Hayner invited to this party. Though I've really got my sights on the blonde twin. I wonder if he even remembers me, or even a fragment of me.

"Fuckin' Hayner! What's happening man?" Riku does the same little handshake with Hayner, only their hands touch again for him to pay Riku. My sly little friend slides his hand into his pocket and just like that they're done. I wonder just how much Hayner bought today. I hope it's enough money to pay the fucking rent on time. Hayner smirks at us and invites us in. I watch as Riku feels around the inside of his pocket for a while, his fingers wiggling inside the fabric and judging by the look on his face he's enjoying it too much. I take a step and end up screaming because I'm about to step on a fucking caterpillar.

"FUCKING BUGS!" I shout and Hayner turns around, his eyes wide and I stare at him, panting. I can't really explain why I'm so afraid, but I just feel like I should be scared to death of this caterpillar. I think it's because I read somewhere that there are poisonous caterpillars out there. The last thing I need would be to die from stepping on a fucking hairy worm.

"Party can't start without you guys," he grins and I'm just a little confused until I look down and see that there is no fucking caterpillar and what I was looking at is a fucking blade of grass on the walk way. I laugh before Riku and I nod our heads. I believe truer words were never spoken. It's pretty obvious we bring life to any party. Well, Hayner's parties are always lively, but we always get there smashed and are still greeted warmly. There are a few people scattered outside, some running around, others simply standing there. It doesn't matter what they are doing though, they'll stop and wave at us like we're in some drug addict parade and Riku and I are the grand fucking marshalls . I wave back, out of courtesy and just to feel the way the air moves around my hand. I can feel it passing in between each of my fingers, and I stop when Riku tugs my hand down. I grin before catching up with Hayner.

The very walls of the house are vibrating, picture frames clattering to the floor and people are just dancing right over them. I feel the vibrations in the soles of my boots and along my bones, sending weird little shivers all through my body. It tickles me as I walk and I wonder if I'm the only one feeling this way. Everyone else seems to not even been bothered by it, but I can't just ignore it. I mean, I can almost feel the bass in my throat. It's so fucking trippy. It feels like I swallowed my heart and it's beating even faster than usual. It's weird because I can feel my real heart, the one in my chest and it's beating frantically. I always find it weird when I feel my heart beat, it feels like I shouldn't be there. It feels like I'd be more normal without a heart, but when I tell Riku he just smacks me and says without my big heart, I wouldn't be me. I don't know if I believe that though, I mean it's your brain that makes you feel after all. Your heart has no hold on emotions whatsoever.

The smell of booze, smoke and sweat is everywhere and it smacks me in the face. I blink, coming out of my mental heart monologue and sniffing the thick air. The smoke in the house just clings to you as soon as you walk through the front door, I feel like I'm walking through fog. The further we walk into the house the more people appear. I can tell, just by watching a few people dance that the stench of sex is going to slowly start making its way into the cock tail of smells. There's also a lot of people at the drink table, chugging down bottles and cheering each other on. I think the smell of puke and urine are going to be joining the party as well. Once we're safely in the house Riku makes his way to the coffee table where a group of teenagers are sitting, while what I guess is a college kid breaks up rails for them. I can see why Riku would move himself in that general direction, so I follow. I walk up to them just in time to hear Riku reciting his favourite line from 'Blow', it's the part where that guy tells George at what temperature pure coke melts at. I've heard Riku say this at every damn party, always telling different people. I don't tell him how annoying it is because he'll probably kick my ass and make me watch 'Blow' for hours until I understand the amazingness of it.

"My stuff usually reaches 183," Riku smirks as the college kid almost collapses. I laugh, watching as they drool all over themselves with just the thought of snorting Riku's angel dust. They have no idea what they are in for, and I can tell just by looking at the stuff they were snorting before. I lean over to an already set up rail and snort it up quickly, nobody says anything, but then again who would want to. I probably look like a person you wouldn't want to fuck with, and I have my mother's amazing height to thank for that.

I sniffle a few times, but with my years of experience I can tell this guy's stuff is shit. I don't say anything because insulting someone's drugs is like calling their first born a retard, but Riku can tell. He dips the tip of his finger in some powder and tastes it, finally making a face. "This stuff is shit...let me show you boys the real fucking deal," quickly, Riku pulls a few baggies out of his pocket and drops them onto the table. Riku doesn't give a fuck about offending people, and I'm pretty sure he'd call someone's kid a retard given the chance. I know by the end of tonight, Riku's going to have a few new custies. I'd stick around and watch, but I'm wired and have energy to spare, plus the E is starting to make me really fucking horny. I turn and scan the crowd for someone to rub up against and relieve some of this tension that's driving me insane, plus the vibrations from the music aren't helping. Just like that, I spot him. The blonde twin. His hips gyrating to some unknown rhythm because he sure as hell isn't dancing to the song blasting out the speakers. I watch in awe as he wiggles around in those tight ass pants. It takes me a few seconds to realize the person he's dancing with is Kairi, the girl is already beyond drunk and I can tell by just watching her dance. Her hot pink dress is hiked high up her thigh and the strap of the dress is falling off her shoulder but she doesn't seem to care. I wonder just where her sister, Naminé, is but knowing that freak it could be anywhere. Watching Kairi and the blonde rub against each other is enough to give me a fucking stiffy. I lick my dry lips when the blonde opens his eyes. The smudged black eyeliner makes them pop and it sort of freaks me out when his eyes make contact with mine. I stand there staring at him from across the room and he slides away from Kairi, the redheaded girl looking a bit startled until she follows the blonde's eyes. She smiles widely when she spots me and takes off through the crowd in a drunken jog. I have to laugh, because really, she looks ridiculous.

"Axel!" She shouts over the music and tosses herself at me. I have to step back a few paces to catch my balance and Kairi. She wraps her arms around my neck and kisses me, her soft lips taste like cherries and whiskey, and I usually hate lip gloss but right now it just feels so fucking good on my dry mouth. When she pulls away she's flushed and I laugh as she slides off me and grabs the blonde's arm, the sensation of her dress sliding down my body makes me shiver. "This is my super sexy, gay cousin, Roxas!" Kairi winks at me and Roxas just eyes me like some prize. I feel sort of self-conscious, but I shrug it off and smirk at him. I can feel the cockiness just oozing out of him. I just have to stare at him though, even if his stare is burning me. I have to figure out what's underneath all that dark make-up. There's this strangely innocent face, yet there's such a hardness about his eyes that makes him look anything but innocent. It's tripping me out.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Roxas," I have to shout, which really is quite awkward when it's your supposed "first time" meeting someone but I don't really think the blonde cares. I actually do care, I mean, I've been waiting for this meeting for such a long time. He doesn't even remember me though. He cocks his hip out and turns to Kairi, though he's still watching me from the corner of his eye. I notice now that he's wearing some sort of corset, it's wrapped tightly around his body, probably making him more shapely than he normally is. Regardless, the soft curves of his body make my mouth water. With an outfit like that he's just begging to be fucked, or something. It's quite a change from the quiet kid I had met in high school. But I decide the new him is just as fucking sexy.

"This is the sure ten?" He asks Kairi and the girl nods her head, quickly turning and if my guess is correct, she's looking for the drink table. I passed it on my way inside, but I want to see how long it takes her to find it herself. She gives up, and turns back towards Roxas and I with a pout on her lips. Literally, it takes her about 4 seconds to give up. I have to suppress quite a deep laugh.

"Axel's sort of a legend around these parts," Kairi giggles a bit when I roll my eyes, I try to stay serious but I just can't around the redhead. I don't think anyone could. "I'll leave you two to get acquainted, mama needs a drink!" and just like that, she leaves us standing there. I'm about to think up awkward conversation topics, anything to at least hear him speak but Roxas seems to have other plans. He grips my wrist and tugs me into the crowd of dancing bodies and I follow along easily. I know deep down it's wrong to let him move so fast, I mean I haven't even said much, yet he's about to jump my bones. I won't lie, I've fantasied about this so many fucking times, but still. In reality, it just makes as much sense as a fucking porn plot. I usually say more than just six words to the person I'm about to fuck. Call me old fashioned but I like to talk to the people I bone. I'll even try and talk if I'm completely shit-faced and about to pass out, but when I'm like that chances are I'm not going to have sex with them anyway.

We reach the middle of the dance floor, or when the house is empty, I'm guessing it's the living room. Roxas goes to grab my arms but I move them away, quickly tugging him against me and showing him that I can be just as aggressive as the little shit. He grins and takes up his grinding again, pressing the front of his hips into my already aching boner. When he feels the hardness behind my jeans he looks up at me with a smirk. "You get hard pretty fast," his voice is low, but I can hear him, considering he's breathing the words right into my ear. I laugh, bringing my mouth to the shell of his ear. I don't want him thinking I'm some softcore virgin. Truth be told, when there's this much coke and booze in my system it's a lot harder to get it up, but Zexion hooked us up with some E on our way over after the gig. Let me tell you, that shit will make you hornier than a fucking rabbit during mating season. But you can probably already tell. I mean, all I've been talking about is fucking.

"Don't get so cocky," I laugh at my choice of words and Roxas seems to find it very funny too, "I popped some E on my way over, I could fuck just about anything," I grin when the blonde pulls away and his blue eyes are shinning brightly under the light.

"Got any left?" he says into my ear in a breathy whisper, and I'd be crazy to deny him anything when he asks like that. I nod my head pathetically and he pulls away with a wicked grin on his face. Quickly, he turns and grips my wrist again, this time pulling me deeper into the house. He has amazing sense of the place I notice. As if he's lived here before. I mean, he knows exactly where he's going. And that seems to be the bathroom. He pushes the door open and shoves me inside, locking the door and turning to me. I feel sort of frightened by the hungry look in his eye. "Alright, we're safe in here," he says a bit more normally. We're just far enough to feel the music but not hear it. It's the weirdest sensation I've ever felt. "I've only got like five bucks on me," he says biting his lip and I shake my head.

"It's okay, this one's on me," with a wink I reach into my tight back pocket and grab the baggie Zexion gave me. I reach in and pull out a tiny pill for Roxas. The blonde smiles like a child who was just offered a candy and he takes it, swallowing it without the help of water. I watch amazed as he just rolls his shoulders and casually leans against the sinks.

"Why don't we start something while we wait for this to kick in," he smiles deviously at me, and again the innocent face that I can sort of see underneath it all is tripping me out. I look at him as he just gently runs his fingers along his torso in such an inviting gesture. I watch the zippers of his vest softly sway after he touches them and I have to feel it for myself for some reason. I walk up to him, pressing him into the sink and his back arches a bit, pressing his thin body into me. He grips the sinks edge and I slowly run my fingers down his chest, my lips just seem to automatically move to his exposed neck. The white skin is too good to resist. It feels so soft between my lips and I move down, leaving a soft trail of spit and feeling goosebumps rise against my mouth. I need to feel more skin, so I grip the main zipper and slowly tug it down, exposing his flat chest. My fingers itch with the need to feel, so I do. I gently run my palm across his chest, feeling his soft nipples slowly rise under my touch. I can also feel that he's hard already but I'm sure the E hasn't kicked in yet. It would take a bit longer than just 4 minutes. While I'm trying to figure out if it's the E or something else helping him, he suddenly kicks into motion, grinding his hips and his dick against my thigh. My hands that were doing I don't know what at this point fly to his hips. I feel myself swell more if that's even possible at this point. And when my hold on his hips tightens to where it could be considered painful, he mewls softly. To tell you the truth it's a fucked up sound and I pull away to look at him.

"So, you want this?" I ask and I don't know why I'm doing this. I usually do it though, before any fuck. Or well, the ones I'm conscious enough to part-take in. Roxas just looks at me with those huge, blue eyes. I can see every detail of him. Like the few soft freckles on the bridge of his nose and the delicate way his skin just smooths across his face. His lips are moist and looking just about ready to explode with the need to kiss. I shiver deeply while he just watches me.

"Oh...oh yeah! Of course, please...I want it," He says the last part really seductively and grips onto the front of my worn out button down shirt. He pulls my face really close to his, I can feel his moistened lips touch mine, and the warm wet tip of his tongue. "I really want this," I feel my entire body tense with the need to just fuck. And I grip his hips tighter, lifting him onto the bathroom counter. He goes at his pant button in a frenzy, his thin fingers pulling frantically at the zipper. I watch, entranced in the way his fingers bend and work. With a puff he undoes the zipper and releases himself from those inhumanly tight jeans. "Ahh, fuck," he hisses and I smirk "I shouldn't wear pants this tight," he sighs happily as I tug the tight material off his legs. Once I get it down to his ankles, he viciously kicks his left leg around, taking the pant leg right off and leaving him free to spread his legs seductively and wrap them around me.

It takes me a while to realize that I can't possibly do this dry or without a condom so I pull away with the last bit of will and sense I have left in me. I look around the bathroom and Roxas stares at me, lost at first until he sighs loudly and with a groan hops off the counter. "Sorry," I mumble pathetically and he just rolls his eyes, tugging open a drawer and pulling out a condom. He hands it to me before gripping some hand lotion and pumping a massive portion of it on my hand. With a tiny bit of awkwardness he hops back onto the counter and positions himself for me to have access, I stuff the condom as far as it will go in my tight pocket and move forward. Thank god he seems to be flexible. With a bit of adjusting, I finally get my fingers near his entrance and he moans softly, probably beyond glad to finally feel something pleasurable. Just to be a teasing ass, I move my fingers around the pink ring of muscle slowly, before at an even slower pace, pushing them into him. He pushes back, trying to force more into him but I control his hips with my free hand. "Be patient," I chuckle and he groans before laying still. I decide I've had my fun and I pull my fingers out quickly, shoving them back in with enough force to jerk Roxas' entire body. He lets out a loud moan, his fingers again digging right into the counter. I keep this pace for a while, scissoring my fingers and touching him until there is sweat pouring down his face and his hair is sticking to his forehead. His legs are trembling and I can tell he's almost done so I slide my fingers out. He shivers and I finally notice the wetness at the front of my jeans. At some point I came, and now I'm completely hard again. Roxas is writhing on the counter, begging me for release so I unbutton the already uncomfortable pants and let my cock slide right out. Roxas holds himself up with shaky arms just to stare down at my dick with hungry eyes. His chest is rising erratically, little droplets of sweat accumulating on his stomach and he's just watching me. I know it's not just me now that feels this scorching heat. I don't know if it's just hot in the bathroom or if it's the E that's making me burn up. I reach clumsily for the condom sticking out of my pocket and I tear it open, and as quickly as possible, I slide the bright pink thing on.

"Nice," he says softly before falling limp and letting me pull his hips toward mine. Slowly I slide into him and I can feel the smooth warmth of his insides all around me, squeezing down as I push my way in deeper. I don't know if it's good or not but I'm about to cum again. Roxas starts a soft rock of his hips, sending a jolt of pleasure down my spine and I grip his thighs, digging my fingers into flesh and material. I can feel the tenseness in his legs and I know I'm not the only one on the brink of losing it. I start moving too now, deciding it's time to end this and head back to the party. Though, if it was up to me, I could stay fucking him all night. There's just something about the way he looks that makes it addicting. It's just something about the innocent face, but the situation contradicting it so violently. I don't know but whatever it is, I could just stare at it forever. Fuck, I find it hilarious how I'd become addicted to him faster than I did with coke. I shake that thought from my head and bite my lip. With a few hard and angled jerks of my hips, he's coming quite a bit onto the counter, his body quivering softly for a few seconds afterwards as I release inside of the condom. I pull away and he just stays there for a second, awkwardly on the counter. I didn't realize how uncomfortable his position was till now. It takes me a while to concentrate enough to take off the condom, but I finally have it. It gets trickier when I have to tie it up and throw it. I don't even notice Roxas and it's too late when I do. He's already taken the condom, tied it and tossed it into the trash. He smirks at me over his shoulder and sucks his index finger. "Before I go...What's your number?" he licks his lips and pulls out a phone. I didn't even realize he had gotten his pants back on. How he did that I will never know. All I know is that my pants are still around my thighs and my dick's still sensitive and exposed. Well, now it's just sort of hanging there like a sock filled with jello. I really hope it doesn't feel that way too.

"Oh uh yeah, 416-108-6756," I smile at him and he just laughs before turning and tugging the bathroom door open.

"I'll call you, bye Axel," and just like that he walks out and shuts the bathroom door. I quickly gather my thoughts and all they are telling me is to pull up my fucking pants. I bend over and pick them up, again tucking my dick between my legs and zipping myself up. It feels a bit more than awkward to walk around with cold jizz on the front of your pants and I'll admit I'm walking like a retard because of it. With a deep breath I suck it up and walk normally out of the bathroom. I decide I might as well go find Riku or something, it'd be cool to tell him I finally fucked one of the twins.

As I'm walking through the house lazily, the loud pounding of the music not even that loud against my ear drums I feel my phone vibrate, feeling like a tiny machine gun decided to call fire on my thigh. I jump startled and reach for my phone, pulling it out with some difficulty. A few people look over at me, and I'm guessing it's because my random yelp. I didn't even notice until now. I could hear the yelp in my head, a few seconds after I actually did it.

_Text from: 416-780-0987_

_Save me under "Sex Machine";)_

I stare down at my phone for a while, people brushing against me and some complaining but all I can do is smirk down at the screen. I had been waiting to meet up with Roxas since the first time I saw him. I had never gone back with Riku on his deals with Hayner but heaven knows I wanted to. I just can't wait to find Riku and tell him.

I really wonder if he bagged the brunette.

* * *

**A/N: **So this meeting scene was inspired from the scene where Axel goes to get Roxas in Twilight town, but Roxas doesn't remember him.  
Well, now this is what my brain gets from that. Haha, anyway, it's been too long since I updated Break Night. I've got some inspiration for this story, so look forward to a little quicker updates.  
Not like everyday ones but less than like months!

Oh and I know, they sexed on their first meeting but it's how it's gotta be folks.  
It's not like they're in love, so I don't want anyone saying "OH IT'S TOO SOON!"  
Honest to gosh, this scene plays a role in the over all scheme of things to come so WAIT and DON'T FREAK OUT!  
lol (:

Thanks everyone for reading, hope you liked it (:


	4. It's So Easy

**Break Night**

Chapter IV: It's So Easy  
_Roxas Fedorov_

I walk out of the bathroom, my eyes wide as fuck but I don't really think I can even try to close them. I stumble a few paces and look back at the dark wood door, expecting what's-his-face to come running out or something but he doesn't. I don't even take time to wonder what's taking him so damn long. My face muscles feel tight, but they are slowly going numb, so I've got more important things to worry about. Besides, I'm sure he can handle himself.

To be completely honest, I don't know how much of what I have in my system, but I'm sure I can last a while longer. I mean, all I've had is the E this guy gave me, Axel or whatever and some free blow from Hayner. Then the blunt I smoked earlier with Naminé and Kairi and my tiny, little joint, so really I haven't had as much as I know I could. I straighten up; an odd sensation between my legs letting me know my asshole is pretty fucking mangled. I don't feel the pain yet, but I'm sure it'll hurt tomorrow or something. I swear his cock head butted my damn stomach.

In a terrible collision of whiskey, all warm and strong smelling mixed with perfume that smells an awful lot like Lilies in The Valley, I'm tumbling to the floor with Naminé right after me. I hear her cup hit the carpet with a thud and I thank God Hayner has soft, plushy floors because shattering glass fucking sucks. Naminé grins at me, her soft hair falling in my face and tickling my nose, making me want to sneeze all my mucus and coke residue on her face. "Hey cousin," she slurs and I shove her off me with a laugh. It felt like gravity was slowly fusing us together, like in some distance place we were a part of each other. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about, but I stand up, feeling a little dizzy only with my senses all wired and in high definition, like on Pay-Per-View. My eyes can't stop seeing all this crazy shit, and Naminé is still sitting on the floor, looking up at me. "You are so fucked," her calm voice is so damn trippy.

"No way, I feel fucking amazing," I smile brightly and extend my hand down towards her, I see her there and she looks like a little girl. I feel like I can't leave her sitting there all alone, in such a scary place. She grips my hand and lets me tug her up, then bends right back over to pick up her fallen, now empty, cup. She starts walking almost right away, making me envy her amazing drunken balance. I haven't had a drop…okay maybe that's a lie. I drank a bit (a lot) but I'm alright. I just can't really walk too straight. Not as straight as Naminé that's for damn sure.

"Did you meet Kairi's boy?" she casts a glance over my shoulder, and by the way her muscles are all pulled up I know she's smirking at me. I laugh, just a pure, clean laugh and flip my bangs off to the side. I feel like I'm in some fucking shampoo commercial or something. I decide I need to save my dignity and stop, biting my bottom lip and nodding, I can't stop biting it though. "Holy damn, you fucked him, you slut!" Naminé slaps me pretty hard on my bare arm, but it doesn't hurt. Not yet. Right now, it feels amazing. She laughs, but it's never loud with her. I wonder how she manages to stay so quiet no matter how intoxicated she gets.

"Fuck you, how are you so sure?" I glare at her, but I know my smile is selling me out like a fucking rat in the mafia. Naminé rolls her baby blues and starts leading me somewhere. I follow her, not really caring where the hell I'm going as long as it's somewhere in this party vicinity. I like the vibe Hayner's place always gets when there is this many people in it. Everyone just sweating together, drinking together, laughing together. It's amazing.

"You give me the same face every time you fuck someone. The little bashful hair flip and lip biting," I notice we've made our way into the kitchen, which isn't nearly as crowded as other places, like the fucking pool and Jacuzzi. Naminé waves at them, a man with a deathly pale hand waves back and I feel creeped out by him. Damn it, just when I said this party was great, I have to be dragged towards the freaks. I should make note to be careful with whom Naminé makes me spend my time around. I mean, she's crazy and I knew that from every family reunion. I can only imagine who she's gotten herself involved with in three years.

The closer we get, the weirder the group looks. I mean, aside from Mr. Fucking Corpse, the group has quite a few wack jobs. There are two that I have no clue what their gender is. I mean, it could be either/or here, is what I'm saying. One has slicked back blonde hair, with two thin strands standing higher than the rest and an XXXL shirt on a body that probably weighs 100 pounds. The other one has wavy pink hair, and a fucking belly top. Last but not least there is a fucking beast among the group, one standing at a good 7 feet and rivaling Arnold Schwarzenegger in build. I know that's a man, for fucking sure. "Naminé, what a pleasure," it's Mr. Corpse speaking, and I'm not any less creeped out than when I was a few feet away.

"Hello Vexen. Guys, I want you to meet my cousin, Roxas." Naminé smiles at me, like that's supposed to make me feel safe around these people. Her smile is even creepy. I look towards the group, hoping the new closeness will let me determine the other two's gender and it does. The one with the slick hair is a girl, introducing herself as Larxene and the other is a man, smiling at me and calling himself Marlushia, but telling me it's spelt with an x. Whatever, like I give a shit. The giant is Lexaeus or something and Mr. Corpse is Vexen. He's still Mr. Corpse to me, honestly.

"We were just about to hit the pipe, you in?" The girl, Larxene says shoving a hand in her pocket and pulling out a few baggies. I eye them as she tosses them onto the counter and I have an internal argument with myself. I look at the baggies, then at the pipe when Marluxia pulls it out. This isn't anything I've done before. I lick my bottom lip, tasting blood but I don't know where the taste is from. It could be my cheek or my lip. Before I can answer the girl, Naminé nods her head and laces her fingers with mine. Mr. Corpse leans over, and so does everyone else, including me and in a few seconds the meth is set in the bowl and the girl sparks it up. I stare at her hands because she's holding the lighter shakily as she inhales. I feel my heart pounding in my throat, because all my life I was told to avoid this. Naminé looks at me, a challenge in her eyes as if saying _'if you're scared, back down'_ but no way in hell am I going to let Naminé do this alone.

Too soon, the pipe is passed to me and I hold it, waiting for the lighter to come around and I finally get it. I look nervously over at Larxene and she's just staring at me intensely. There isn't any expression on her face and I wonder if it froze that way. "Ready?" Vexen says passing me the lighter and I nod my head, gripping it tightly before lighting up and taking a long hit. This shit is fucking bitter.

I don't know what happens next but the pipe is out of my hand and I'm leaning against the counter, watching the marble top as the coolness of it seeps into the tips of my fingers. I'm so heavy, and I think I'm going to throw up. I must be throwing up because I can feel it in my mouth, or maybe that's just smoke. I wait, expecting vomit to shoot out of my mouth but it doesn't, and instead my eyes dart off to the side not finding anything to look at. There is nothing for me to stare at; everything is moving too quickly, changing.

I feel nails digging into my skin and I look down to see Naminé's thin, manicured fingers drawing blood as she grits her teeth badly, smoke slowly slipping from her nose and parted lips. Her eyes are huge when she looks up at me quickly, the sting from where her nails are stays even after she retracts her claws and moves away from me. She's laughing quietly to herself but I don't see anything funny, instead everything is too bright. I push off the counter, which is a bad mistake. The air around me feels like thick jelly, or maybe I'm just moving too fast for time, so I'm caught somewhere in between. I shout, not sure why until Naminé runs past me and clings to Vexen, her fingers tangling in his hair and making him kiss her. I look away, partially because I don't want to get turned on by watching my cousin make out with some guy and because I've just noticed the silence in the house. "_Why_ is it so quiet?"

"Axel Steel and his band of faggots are going to play now," ironically it's the one in the belly top who says this and I burst out laughing, pointing a finger at him but I can't get what I want to say out, I can't stop myself from laughing long enough to say words. I laugh harder when I keep thinking, because it's just so damn funny. How could he have the nerve? How could he? I haven't laughed this hard in my life.

"Faggots," is all I can squeeze out, or at least it's the only coherent thing I say before I turn and leave the kitchen completely on a whim. My legs aren't mine, in fact I'm sure at some point during the last few minutes they were switched and I'm walking away with something that doesn't belong to me. I stare down quickly ready to throw myself into a fit of panic, the room blurring for a few seconds until I focus on the tight material wrapped around my legs. I feel the way it constricts me, I can even feel the stitching. I laugh, because I'm wearing girl pants, and these are definitely my legs. "Faggot."

It's with stumbling, groping and the sound of guitars that I find my way to the basement, where Axel is standing along with his entire band, tuning Hayner's out-of-tune, never-used instruments. There are 4 of them standing out among everyone but my eyes can't focus long enough to see who they are. Looking back I notice that none of Vexen's friends followed me and it leaves me wondering if they dislike Axel's music.

Holy fucking God, I hope it's not the meth but I see the same silver haired guy I saw once in high school with Hayner. He was our dealer once upon a time; he was close to being my God because his fucking coke was the best. I stare with wide eyes, my hand squeezing something tightly and I realize it's someone's shoulder when they turn and stare at me. I let go, and with what I think is an apology, I smile at them or well it's not really a smile. I'm grinding my teeth way too hard to smile. She doesn't have a face, which stands out to me a lot and the longer I stare, the less details she has. I have to look away, because slowly she is becoming terrifying and I make my way closer, or at least as close as the bodies will let me get.

Music, when in life has it been so great? I mean, I've been listening to it since forever, but I've never heard such a beautiful song as the one the silver haired guy is playing out quickly on the guitar. I don't know what it is, it could be the scales for all I know but it just sounds so damn godly. Axel clears his throat and I stare over at him, somehow, someway he got a microphone. I spot Hayner standing off to the side, a girl on either side of him and I see that one is Olette. I want to wave crazily, but I'm distracted by Axel talking. "Hello and Good night everyone, it's Axel fucking S-t-double e- l speaking and I'm going to rock you out with one of my favorites, if y'all like this come check us out at The Red Label…" Did he just say the club I work at? Axel performs there? Holy fucking shit.

Whoa, a drum set…I hear a drum set…I didn't even know Hayner had one of those. I look around trying to locate the sound, and dear God almighty, there he is. The guy with the _mullet_, the one with the fucking _weeed_.

"_It's so easy, easy when everybody's tryin' to please me, baby."_

Axel's voice pounds through everyone and soon the crowd swings into motion, the silver haired guy jumping around crazily, like he has way too much energy to spare. Axel is running back and forth, throwing his arms up and thrusting his hips into the air. I watch their movement with hungry eyes, picturing all the things that movement could do to my body. I shiver and bite my lip, digging my teeth hard into the soft skin and enjoying the metallic taste as a few drops of blood find their way onto my tongue. I keep listening to him sing as I'm swept up by the current of dancing. I can't wait to hear this at work. The guitar goes insane, crying out and coating everyone with its amazing power and I start thrashing, a lot of people following my drift and soon enough it's chaos. Fists are being thrown and bodies are being tackled. I feel like I'm the only one who isn't hurting, so I keep throwing hits and feeling nothing come back. This is a big basement, and there is so much empty space during the day…I wonder just how much people are shoved in here punching and kicking.

"_Ya get nothin' for nothin' if that's what you do. Turn around bitch I got a use for you, besides you ain't got nothin' better to do…and I'm bored…"_

It's all over too quickly, the guitars are pulled out by someone knocking over the amps and the silver haired guy is jumping into the crowd, Axel running and tackling some guy straight to the ground. The drummer, who I can't really see whips his sticks into the crowd before ducking behind the set. A full on brawl starts, and there are so many fists and objects flying around I feel like I'm in the middle of World War fucking III. I run for cover, laughing crazily and I smack into someone, someone tall. I look up, seeing for the second time, that 7 foot beast that I thought I had left in the kitchen. He looks about ready to rip my head clean off my neck, until there is a flash of red, and the faint smell of sweat and Jack Daniels and I'm tugged away, pulled through the crowd and towards the out skirts of the action. I can distantly hear Hayner screaming at a few people and I know for sure the party is over. I blink the sweat from my eyes and stare towards the person who saved my fucking life. It's Axel and he's smiling down at me. God, those lips would probably feel so damn good all over my skin right now.

We're interrupted by a flying bar stool smashing against the wall almost nailing Axel in the head and he laughs loudly before ducking and grabbing my hand, pulling me up the stairs, a whole slew of people following us into the foyer. I hadn't noticed that more than half the party goers were crammed into the basement. Everyone is screaming and just stampeding out of Hayner's house, the door is thrown open and everyone seems to agree that it's time to bail. I look back, trying to see if I can spot Sora or maybe even Kairi but I don't see anyone. I let Axel drag me with him to wherever he's going. It's better than waiting around for the cops to show up, with my luck it'll be Cloud who's on duty and heaven forbid he sees me like this.

The feeling of puking takes over me and before I can warn Axel, the warm vomit is pouring out of my mouth and down the front of Kairi's clothes. The night air is cold, and the tears sting my eyes but I can't stop running long enough to bend over and heave into the grass. Finally I start choking, my oxygen supply getting cut off and I let go of Axel's hand and double over. I keep puking; it feels like it's never going to stop and I'm scared…so fucking terrified. I'm going to die, and the worst part is I'm completely alone. I'm going to puke till I pass out in it and drown. No one is going to save me. Dear God, _why?_

I hear a voice somewhere over me, uttering curses until a hot palm is pressed to my forehead and my hair is pushed back and away from my face. Could it be an angel, coming to guide me through my death? I wouldn't be surprised. A gentle hand caresses my back and slowly, the urge to spew my guts out subsides, my stomach finally settling as the last of it dribbles down my chin. I'm saved. I look up to see Axel through my burning, teary eyes. No one has ever actually taken care of me while I puked before and it's strangely touching. "Awww," I say, a few pitches too high and Axel just grins at me. I feel like kissing him, I think I'll do it.

"Not full of barf, you don't," Axel pushes me away and I feel hurt, tears materialize in my eyes before I even realize that I'm going to cry. Axel seems confused for a second until he shakes his head, gripping my hand and tugging me. I don't think I can handle more running as I wipe the barf off my face with the back of my free arm.

The end of Hayner's street appears and I laugh, tears still streaming down my face because I can't keep them from coming. Axel is just laughing too and I don't even think he knows why, while squeezing my hand. I'm not really seeing much of anything, my eyes darting around at 100 mph, not giving me time to get a clear image. I'm mostly going on sound and judging by the steady thump of Axel's boots, I wonder just how he can keep up such a steady jog. My eyes decide to stop moving enough to let me see a bus shelter, and pray to God that's where he's dragging me to. "I'll call a cab," Axel stops and lets me sit, my feet feel numb, almost like they aren't there and I have to stare at my boots just to make sure they are. I hear Axel talking and then it's quiet. Everything feels so choppy, almost like reality is a scratched CD and it's skipping important parts, or even missing just a few seconds. Anything that is enough to notice the gaps in time.

I can't wait to get to wherever we're going and get all this barf off of me. I toss my head back and close my eyes, praying that will keep me from actually enjoying the warm wetness on my chest. I can't really smell anything, so the strange sticky feeling is quite enjoyable. I know if I let myself think this, I'm going to regret it in the morning and feel like such a freak. That is, if I even remember half of this shit. I hear Axel grunt as he plops his ass down on the bench. Usually these wooden seats aren't comfortable, often times they are quite dangerous, considering no one wants a splinter in their ass but right now, they feel like luxury sofas. I could stay here forever, with my eyes shut and the night wind on my skin. If I trust on the TTC drivers, I might just sit here forever. They are never on schedule anyway, but wait...we're taking a cab.

"Roxas…wake up," I jump, ready to start fighting until I focus and realize it's Axel touching me. His hand sends flashes of heat and pleasure down my arm and I look up at him. He smiles, sniffling a few times before helping me to my feet and leading me over to a big yellow blob, which I'm guessing is the taxi. Strange, I always thought they looked different…I blink wondering just what happened because I wasn't asleep, I was just in deep thought, watching the backs of my eyelids and the patterns presented to me. I guess time went by quickly.

I want to ignore the way the cabbie looks at me, but I can't. I send him a nasty look and Axel just pushes me into the corner. "What?" I bark out, gripping the back of his seat and giving it a shake, ready to fight; in fact I'm itching for it. I'm so fucking…_itchy_. I feel it in my brain. The driver doesn't say anything; instead he lets Axel tell him the direction of wherever we're going and starts driving. Whatever, I didn't want to fight him either. I'm too fucking itchy to fight. I start clawing at my arms, ready to peel the skin away as long as this fucking itching stops. I scratch at my head, ruining my hair then going back to my arms. There must be bugs under my skin, because I can feel them and I know I have to get them out. A dark red liquid appears, dripping down my arm and tinting the tips of my fingers after a really hard scratch and Axel looks over before totally flipping shit.

"Whoa, what the fuck!" he shouts before untying the bandana he has secured around his boot. He grabs my arm, taking away the itch with his touch and he wraps up my forearm. The dark liquid I realize is blood, and I watch it slowly seep into the white material. I stare at the tips of my fingers, which all are covered in blood and decide I want to taste it. Gingerly I lick it all away, and I feel Axel just watching me. I can feel the itch slowly coming back too, starting at the backs of my eyeballs and spreading down my spine. I need him to touch me, to stop this itching.

"C'mere," I say and I don't know if he understands me or not. He looks torn between accepting and gagging, so I wonder what the hell I look like. Then I remember I'm covered in fucking vomit.

"We're here," he says and I climb out of the cab before the guy even has a chance to fully stop. They both shout at me from inside the car as I stumble out onto the street, looking around at all the tall buildings I'm surrounded by. It's a cute little neighborhood I guess, not as fancy as the one where Naminé and Kairi live, but I wouldn't mind staying in a place like this. It looks fucking beautiful at night.

Axel walks over to me and grabs my wrist, immediately the itching in that spot stops and I giggle as he tugs me towards an apartment building. The floor feels like it's moving with me, so walking is a little hard considering every step I take doesn't even move me forward. I step down harder, trying to propel myself, trying to move faster than the ground. A strong tug stops me and I stand in the middle of the street with Axel staring at me. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" He raises an eyebrow high on his forehead and I shrug before laughing loudly, then screaming until my throat burns and he covers my mouth with his hand. Ah, the relief of not being itchy. "Stop that man…you're fucking tripping," I'm swept off my feet and into the air, the sensation making me want to puke but I have nothing left in me. I realize Axel's picked me up and that no, I'm not flying or doing anything cool but I am moving faster than the ground. I stare at it, mocking it because it couldn't keep me outside forever.

Everything is so fast, and I mean that. I seriously just blinked and we're already in an elevator being taken either up or down, I'm not sure. Wherever we're going, Axel figures I can make it on my own and gently sets me on my wobbly feet. I stand there, looking around the metal elevator and I wonder just where we are. I know the answer should be obvious, but it isn't. "Where are we?" I ask and Axel just looks at me before laughing and rubbing his face.

"Heading to my apartment. What the hell are you on dude?" Axel's eyes are so green; in fact I think they are too green. No human being should be allowed to have eyes that colour, it's unnatural. The fact that he's taking me to his apartment just registered in my mind and I wonder if he's going to rape me. Well, can't rape the willing is what I always say. I've actually been wanting a round fucking two since I walked out of the bathroom. I just hope he'll let me take the fucking barf off me first.

"Meth," I shrug and he looks like he's going to scream but he stops. I wouldn't have thought he'd react this way, I actually thought he did it or something. I guess I'm wrong because he doesn't look too impressed. He shakes his head as the elevator doors open and I hurry after him. "What? What's your problem?"

"My mom fucking died 'cause of that shit. That's my problem. You shouldn't do that crap, it's poison." I consider this ironic, coming from someone that slipped me some E in a party bathroom but I also see his point. The fact that he told me his mom died makes me feel like I just had an intimate moment with my soon-to-be booty call. It's weird, but I don't mind much. I don't know why I agreed to do this shit, and maybe it was just not to feel inferior next to Naminé. If she could smoke meth, then I sure as hell could too. I know now it wasn't the best decision I've made, but I've never been one to make good choices. "You should also stay away from Vexen…he's bad news."

"One time thing, honest," I feel the need to let him know I'm not going to do meth ever again. I know I won't, and I want him to know that too. I don't know why this is so important but it is. Then I realize he just warned me about Vexen. I knew that guy was no good, I wonder if Naminé knows. "Will do…he gave me the willies anyhow," he looks over his shoulder and smiles before pulling out a set of keys and opening his apartment door.

"Well, that's good to know. Let's get you out of those clothes, huh?" his smirk is all the invitation I need. I run into the apartment, and he has to stop me from getting naked right there in his living room. He grips my wrist again and leads me towards a small bathroom where he slowly unzips my vest and lets it drop to the floor. Thankfully most of the vomit is dried, so it doesn't splatter and my pants aren't that caked with it either. The cool air around my thighs lets me know I'm now fully fucking naked and Axel is staring at me with a fucking boner trying it's hardest to tent his tight pants. "I've never been turned on by someone covered in fuckin' puke," he laughs and I really like the way it sounds. It's better than that guitar that silver haired dude was playing.

The urge to kiss him is driving me crazy and I know he won't as long as I have this barf on my chin so I turn the sink's hot water and scrub my face almost violently. I figure I might as well clean my mouth, so I swish the hot water inside and spit it out. Then the dried vomit tugs my arm hairs and I remember I should clean that too. Deeming myself ready, I turn to look at him and grab his head, smashing our mouths together hard enough to make one of us bleed. I bite his lip, making him groan in pain and the need to grind my teeth just makes me bite harder. He hisses and tugs his face away, a thin trail of blood and spit trickling down his chin as he moves in to kiss and bite my neck. I groan and bite the inside of my cheek, needing to chew on something. His teeth sink in and the pain jolts my spine, it's so intense.

I was right, his lips feel amazing on my overly sensitive skin and I can feel every last nerve spark to life with each little touch of his. I feel like I'm on fire and my dick is so hard I think it could cut diamonds. I push him down by the shoulders and he easily gets on his knees, looking up at me with those glowing green orbs. Fuck, I just want to skull fuck the hell out of him.

Before I can talk, he takes me into his mouth and I almost faint because it feels so damn good. So slick and wet and perfect. God, who would have known getting a blow job from a lead singer could feel so fucking heavenly. His mouth just seems to work better than a hand ever could, not the mention the warm wetness completely engulfing me. I bury my fingers in thick red hair, scratching his scalp lightly when I curl my hand into a tight fist. I know I must be pulling his hair quite a bit. I push his head down more and buck my hips, making him suck harder, forcing him to swallow more, until his nose makes contact with my skin. I think he chokes, but I can't be sure. All I know is that my dick is in his mouth, and it's fucking good. His tongue feels like something better than silk, because honestly that material is the shits. His tongue, all pink and moist just has a whole different feeling. Something completely original and I feel it more and more with each flick and long, hard lick. I ease up, letting him come up for air and he coughs a little before taking me back in, pressing my junk into the roof of his mouth with his tongue, caressing a pulsing vein that I just know is there. I can feel it beating against his mouth. I know, it's fucking insane to have sex with the same person in one night, but holy shit. Axel fucking Steel can sing and Lord knows I'm a sucker for a musician.

I can swear that I've never came this hard in my life, it bursts out of me, feeling like a fucking supernova. My legs tremble and when my dick flops out of his mouth, I fall onto my knees right in front of him. He has a little cum mixing with the blood and I lick it away, not really caring that it's my own fucking jizz I just tasted. He smirks before kissing me again, that amazing thing he calls a tongue dancing inside of my mouth and making me hard again. It's incredible how horny I am right now.

He pulls away and stands up, leaving me there and I look up at him, my non-busy mouth now busily grinding my teeth down to nothing. He shakes his head, dusting off his pants and helping me to my feet. "I can't fuck you while you're on meth…I just…can't. I'll get you some gum and you can shower."

I'm left alone in the bathroom and I blink crazily, the sound of bone wearing down bone echoes loudly and I realize I wouldn't want to fuck me either right now. Listening to the disgusting sound of teeth grinding is enough to give me goose bumps. Plus, I still kind of smell like vomit. Fuck, to think I could be having sex right now if it weren't for this fucking meth. Ah, I want to scream…but instead I turn on the shower and step under the spray. God, this is fucked up, this water…where does it come from?

"Here…there are some clothes on the toilet and towels are hanging right there…take this gum," he sticks his hand in and I grab the little stick, shoving it in my mouth and I'm sure my teeth will be very thankful. I watch Axel leave through the little tear in the curtain and I have to think, just who else has taken care of me like he has tonight. Definitely no guy I've ever slept with or been with, that's for sure. The only other person I can think of is Sora. But he's my brother and he loves me. I don't know whether to be suspicious of Axel's friendly, caring nature or to just accept it. I guess it could be good to have a loving booty-call, but I'm not sure right now. I'll just enjoy the great head while I get it.

My thought is cut off when I realize that there is music playing, the song immediately making me think back to Hayner's party.

"_I make the fire but I miss the firefight, I hit the bull's eye every night…"_

Yeah, it is so fucking easy.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay so, we meet more characters here, lala wondrous!  
Axel and Roxas getting buddy buddy! W00t.  
Roxas being a little careless and what not, but we've got Axel there to guide him :]

I hope the wait was worth it guys.  
My living arrangements have been improved, I at least have my own room and a computer!  
Updates in abundance!  
Haha, well hopefully.

Your friendly neighborhood Sharmander.


	5. Rocket Queen

**Break Night**

Chapter V: Rocket Queen

_Axel Steel_

Cocaine give me strength. I've never liked dealing with meth heads, so sitting in the living room while Roxas trips out and tries to rip the skin off his bones isn't at all fun for me. I watch him as he paces, scratching at his head, his face, his legs, basically every inch of flesh he can reach. It's driving me crazy, so I lean in for another bump. Some one is playing music in the background and I wonder when or if Roxas turned that on, though I doubt it was him. It could have been me, but I can't remember. The powder dusts my top lip and I lick it away, fighting against the urge to gag at the taste, instead thinking about the song. It's Guns for sure…Rocket Queen, hah awesome. After all these years, you'd think I'd be used to it, the taste of coke, so bitter and just wrong. Roxas seems to have fucking drug censors because he turns around and stares at me, his eyes looking a little crazy.

"Can I have some of that?" He asks, walking towards the table and dropping onto the sofa. I shake my head and finish off the baggie because frankly, I think he's had enough. Call me a hypocrite, call me what you will, but once you're as fucked up as he is, there is a last call, and his was long ago. I snort loudly, regretting it when the taste comes back in a tiny assault of my taste buds. I wipe my hand over my numb face, before staring out the balcony window, the taste of cocaine slithering down the back of my throat. I tell time like the pioneers or the natives when I come home from parties, because sometimes the numbers on the VCR blur and fade. Sometimes they aren't there at all. The sky however is there forever. Right now, it's dawn, the orange glow of the sun filling the apartment with a warmth unlike any other. I bask it in, while Roxas twitches a few times, his eyes look tired but he's wide awake. It must be torture to need sleep, to yearn for it but it seems to never come. He sits there, staring up at the ceiling and I wonder if he sees it, or if I'm the only one who even cares. "Your ceiling is fucking dull…so boring," he says and I have to laugh, and laugh a lot. I'm glad I'm not the only crazy one who thinks so. "You…should paint swirls on it, or something."

"Yeah…hey, you wanna stay here for your crash?" I ask after time has passed, and I surprise myself. I've never taken care of anyone while they come down, but something about Roxas just makes me want to have him close by. My heart's thumping in my chest and I don't know what to pin it on, because I've got so much shit in my system it's not even funny. I'm scared to think that maybe I've fallen in love with him, but that's just stupid. This is only my second time seeing him, and my first official time ever speaking to him, so it's impossible, right? I should stop thinking because frankly, that shit can kill a man if he does it long enough.

"_So don't chastise me or think I, I mean you harm. Of those that take you, leave you strung out much too faaar. Baaaaby-yeah…"_

"That'd be nice…just…don't rape me," he yawns, breaking off the trance of Axl Rose's voice and I look at him before he curls against the sofa's armrest like a little drugged up kitten. I watch him as he falls asleep, feeling just slightly creepy. I'm glad the meth is wearing off, and I can tell because he falls asleep really quickly. I guess he didn't smoke as much as I thought and I'm so fucking glad, I can't even explain it. I feel a swell of happiness as a small snore makes its way into the stale air of the apartment; the CD seems to have finished with that last song.

Fucking Roxas…I think it's something about his blunt, straight-to-the-point attitude that's got me hooked like a fish on a line. He reminds me so much of my mother, and you know what they say. Men will always end up with someone who resembles in some way, their mother. It's fucked, but then again most of that psychological stuff is. Fucking Freud and his weird incestful theories.

It's then, when Roxas is fast asleep that I notice Riku isn't in the apartment and I've watched the sunrise on my own for the first time in a long while, the loneliness finally seeping into my bones. I stare down at my pale fingers, watch the ligaments tug and contract as I close my hand into a fist and I have to wonder, just who made me this way. Was it that unknown presence in the back of every sinners mind, usually referred to as God? The one who supposedly watches over our every move, and if he did make me…is he ashamed?

My gaze follows along a thick vein in the center of my wrist, where just over it lies a tattooed cross. My mother was a catholic, though she never went to church. She wasn't allowed in and neither was I for being the son of a whore. Regardless though, she prayed every day and thanked God for whatever shit she placed on the table. I'm not catholic, the very idea appalls me, but I like to think that my mother was taken by God. Taken to a place where she didn't have to suck dick just to get a fix, taken to a place where she didn't even need one. My hands look just like hers. My knuckles sticking out a lot, with a scar on every single one, like a little silvery toupee. I try to recall just how I got these markings, but nothing comes to memory. My body is filled with the ghost of unknown cuts and gashes, long ago healed but never fully gone. If I sit and try to bring up their stories, I'll lose my mind. And really, I've lost too much to let that slip too.

Roxas stretches out and I think about how uncomfortable this couch is, and when he wakes up, hours from now he's going to be sore, even more so than I know he's going to be for sure. His skin is all irritated, long red scratches adorning his arms and neck, there's even one marring the perfect skin of his cheek, not to mention the gash he gave himself in the taxi. It's a crazy thought, but I move him to my bed, scooping him off the old sofa and into my arms. I've never let anyone sleep in my bed, the very idea of their dead skin cells falling onto my sheets makes me sick. The thought of him being in pain unsettles me even more than his flaky skin though. Maybe it's got a little something to do with that innocent look he wears on his face while passed out, now in full bloom instead of just peaking from beneath the surface. He looks like a tiny cherub nestled on a cloud when the evils of this world are blocked out by the wondrous powers of sleep. He fits right against me; like he's the missing piece that I've needed to fill the gap and I hold him close. God, I sound so ridiculous right now, I even want to hit myself. I shiver, feeling the cool tips of his fingers brush against my neck when he wraps his arms around me and clings for dear life. He's light, for the most part and thank god he doesn't smell like puke anymore. "Sora…let me sleep," he mumbles and I'm slightly confused but I shrug it off.

I place him on my bed gently, making sure the sheets are clean but something tells me he wouldn't care either way. I remember, a time long ago, before my mother's personality slowly decayed and crumbled behind a crystal addiction, when she tucked me in. I pull the sheets out from under him and do the same, making sure he's snug and I turn to leave. I spare one last glance before walking back out into the living room, pulling out my cell phone just to see if anyone's called. There aren't any missed messages or anything and I sort of have to fight off the worry. I don't want to sound like a pessimist, but Riku would have called me by now.

Just as I walk towards the kitchen, I hear the front door open, the rattling chains from Riku's pants something I've come to recognize over the years, along with the thump of his boots when he kicks them off at the entrance. "Axel?" he calls out, and I smile before sticking my head out and looking at him. My smile vanishes and I run out, catching him before he falls right into my arms, blood soaking the hand he has pressed tightly against his stomach. I place him on the floor gently, and he laughs before pushing me away and slowly standing again. He walks a little, stumbling and supporting himself against every wall until finally he reaches the bathroom, leaving a trail of bloody hand prints. I follow him quickly and watch as he throws open one of the drawers under the sink, rummaging through it until he finds the First Aid kit. I spot Roxas' pile of dirty clothes and cringe, hoping Riku doesn't see it. I'm glad his sense of smell is shot, or else the stench would totally drag his attention to the clothes that clearly doesn't belong to either of us.

"Shouldn't you go to the hospital?" I ask, standing at the door uneasily as I watch him peel his shirt off, tossing it into the bath tub and exposing his stomach. There is definitely a stab wound, blood slowly oozing out of it and smeared all around but I can't tell if it's life threatening. Judging by the way Riku looks up at me, cool and collected; he's going to be fine. I swear he is near impossible to kill. My heart drops from its post in my throat and settles back into its place, just as he uncaps the rubbing alcohol and dumps the whole bottle onto his stomach. I figure I shouldn't tell him there was a more humane way of doing that. Like maybe with a cloth or a gauze.

"OH, FUCK ME!" He screams, the veins in his throat popping out as he grinds his teeth, before reaching over and passing me the kit with a shaky hand. I grab it from him, not really knowing what to do until I realize that he probably wants me to sew him up. I blink a few times, my eyes burning from the strong stench of alcohol mixing with puke, while he writhes on the toilet seat. His fists are clenching and unclenching until finally he stops, his stomach muscles tight with the wound still slowly trickling blood. "Okay…" he pants, grabbing a towel from behind him and wiping away the blood and alcohol, before shoving a clean corner into his mouth. He nods and I get the needle ready, ripping it out of the little package and sticking the string through. I decide I'll probably need to wipe blood and I grab another clean towel. So much for not wanting to waste/stain towels. I make a mental note to pick up more.

"I still think you should go to a hospital…I mean…is it deep?" I look up at him before dropping on my knees, crawling until I'm close enough to stitch him shut. I shouldn't be squeamish, but I am. Piercing his taut stomach with the curved needle makes my skin crawl, especially when he twitches as I pull the thread through.

"Do you think I'd actually let some fucker stab me?" he tosses his towel away and opts for just taking it like a man, with nothing to bite down on when I pierce the skin again. I watch the wound close, both sides of the puncture coming together and I feel slightly proud of myself for doing such a good job. The last stitch is in place and I snip the string with tiny scissors, tossing the needle in the garbage and pushing the kit over beside the toilet. I look around for the hamper but I don't find it, so I toss the towel where the rest of the stuff is, in the bathtub.

"Well…kinda looks like you already did," I laugh when he rolls his eyes, standing up and looking down at his newly stitched cut. He shrugs at me before walking out of the bathroom and I follow him, mostly because I know there is a fucking story behind this and because I'm still not too convinced that he's alright. Another reason would be to get away from the pungent smelling washroom.

"He just got the tip in before I pushed him away and knocked him out," I laugh loudly, mumbling a _'that's what she said'_ before Riku shuts me up with a withering glare. I bite my bottom lip to keep from laughing because it's just too funny to stop, a sharp sting reminds me of the deep cut Roxas gave me and I have to release my lip. "This is serious dip shit. Vexen tried to kill me."

All laughter dies in my throat at the mention of that blonde haired bastard and my hairs all stand on end. My smile, well there isn't even a trace of it left and I grip Riku's shoulder, he just looks at me before pulling the bottle of Jack Daniels out of the cupboard and chugging some. He scowls when he slams the bottle down onto the counter before wiping his mouth on the back of his hand and deciding to tell me just what happened. "After you boogied with the blonde bombshell, the fight downstairs got bad. I cornered Vexen and I was about to pound him into the concrete but he pulled out his switch blade and came at me. I don't know what his problem was, or maybe he's just got bad aim but he missed the first time." He laughs, and I glare at him because it's not fair that he can laugh and I have to stay quiet. Well, not like I feel much like laughing anymore anyway. Another gulp of Jack and he continues, "Whatever, we ended up wrestling for the knife on the floor and that's when he almost killed me. He got it in and was about to push down with his whole body weight but I kicked him off, got on top and beat his face in."

"That fucking bastard…we can't leave it like this Riku," I clench my fists, ready to march over to Vexen's fucking meth lab and beat the fucker with every thing in his apartment. Riku just shakes his head, waving me off before taking a few more gulps, hissing when he stops. I stare waiting for a response, but he's too busy drinking. I cannot believe that Riku wouldn't actually want to fight someone after they stabbed him! "What? You can't be serious Ku…"

"Listen Ax…it's fucked up but…I saw Zexion hangin' with them." Again my mouth goes dry and I just stare at Riku like a fish out of water. Zexion was hanging out with Vexen? Well, that's just fucking twisted. I swear, every time that periwinkle haired faggot was in my house, we warned him about Vexen. We told him stories. Like the time I fucking walked in on Larxene and him at some party, the blonde freaks were taking advantage of some poor passed out girl on the floor. Larxene sat with the chick's head in her lap, dragging an exact-o knife along her chest while Vexen fucked her. I freaked out and ran away from there. I wasn't about to go in and have my throat slit by that psycho bitch, Larxene, for some unknown girl but I wasn't going to stay and watch either.. "I've got a bad feeling about them hanging out, but I want to see what the deal is." I nod my head, never one to question Riku, especially when he's got a feeling.

I decide I should probably tell him that Roxas is asleep in my room right now. Though I'm a little weary on how his reaction is going to be. I clear my throat, snatching the bottle and taking a gulp. It burns like swallowing fire and I slam it onto the counter. Already, he's giving me this look, his eyebrow all lowered and his lips twisted in this weird, cynical smile he has.

"I brought Roxas to the house…" I blurt out turning and walking into the living room, I hear Riku slide the bottle off the counter and follow me. He sits calmly on the couch and turns on the T.V, looking around for something before finally looking up at me.

"Did you fuck him?" he asks before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a baggie of coke. He sniffles, wiping the bottom of his nose doing the routine check, before dumping the contents onto the mirror I had been using before. I look up at the T.V and wonder just what Riku left on. It's a show about robots, these tiny spherical robots. It's really fucking weird. I sit down a little stiffly and pick at a stain on my pants.

"Uhm…yeah…I did," I don't know why I feel so weird around Riku right now, and I quickly realize I'm being a paranoid idiot. I relax into the cushions and grab the remote, Riku looking at me before dipping his head and snorting. I know Riku doesn't give a fuck what I do, and he proves that as he comes up and laughs before wiping his nose clean.

"The brunette's a fuckin' prude. Most he did was danced a little dirty…" his eyes look kind of far away and dreamy and I nudge him, some weirdo commercial playing in the background. Riku finally focuses on me and smiles brightly, jumping onto my thighs, pushing me back onto the couch and yanking on a chunk of red hair. I yelp in pain, rubbing my sore scalp and he laughs. "But…I don't know Ax, I still wanna try…like he's making me work for it, you know? And I want to," Riku laughs more and I just sit there amazed.

"Riku…you sound like a fucking girl!" I burst out laughing and he glares at me before punching me right in the liver. I grunt in pain and he sets up another line, while I lay there holding my aching side, my guts feel like they're pulsing.

"Fuck you Steel, then you say I'm not an open friend. Bastard," Riku snorts loudly and clears his throat, slouching again and completely losing the dreamy look. I feel sort of bad so I straighten up and move to sit closer to him, deciding I should tell him some pansy thought I had about Roxas.

"I think I'm in love with Roxas," I say it out loud and it's not so bad, Riku however almost snaps his neck when he looks at me. He blinks, looking like a deer caught in headlights for a good 3 minutes and I just sit there, having nothing to stare at but his face. Slowly, he lifts his hand to wipe the residue away from his nose and I swallow, not wanting to hold his gaze anymore. It's so intense, all I can see are his pupils, drilling holes into my soul as they float around in that teal iris. It scares me sometimes.

"Dude, sorry but that's stupid," he shrugs and I try not to get angry, my short temper something so easy to flare up. I clench my fists and watch Riku snort another line, wondering just how much more he plans on doing, I for one am really starting to get sleepy. But I digress, I guess it is sort of stupid if you think about it, I mean, I've never settled for one person at any time in my life. I guess suddenly wanting one person is weird and spontaneous of someone like me but it's the truth. Something about Roxas makes me want no one else, even if I don't even know him. I can't explain this properly. "I mean, you only saw him twice and once barely counts. How can you be in love?"

"Hey, don't ask me, ask my heart…"I cross my arms over my chest and Riku just laughs at me. Really, he looks over at me, makes eye contact and directly laughs in my face, his big smile spreading almost ear to ear as he just yucks it up. I expected that sentence to just finish off this talk but clearly it didn't have any effect on Riku. I blush the longer he keeps laughing and finally he stops. I should have known he wouldn't be a strong believer in _'Love at First sight'_.

"Your heart doesn't feel anything. It's your brain stupid…but whatever. I don't care," he gets up off the sofa and I look down at the mirror, seeing it clear of any white powder and I wonder just how he does it. I get up, following him into the hall way and he stretches before putting his hand on my shoulder. "If you have found the love of your life, let's just hope he'll feel the same," and just like that he turns and leaves me in the hall alone. Going to lock himself in his room and do Riku things, which really, I have no clue what they are.

I look out the nearest window, the sun almost high in the sky and I decide I might as well take a nap seeing as I don't work at the café today, thank god. I have to be at The Red Label tonight with everyone around 7, so some sleep would probably be really good. I tip toe into my bedroom, peeling my t-shirt off and slowly sliding under the covers. I'm too fucking tired to shower, or even take my pants off. I probably stink like sweat but I can't find energy to care, my body is completely drained.

I sigh, the sheets cool on my stomach and Roxas breathes deeply, scooting closer and throwing his arm over my chest. I put my hands under my head and just shut my eyes, thinking that I could really get used to this.

When I wake up, the bed is empty and the apartment sounds dead. I sit up, my hair making that static noise as I pull away from the pillow, crusty eyes not wanting to open. I scratch my head, my groggy brain slowly coming to life and I look at the window when I can finally see, to try and gauge what time it is. It's dark out, which gets me into a bit more of an alert state. I wonder just how long I slept and I wonder where the fuck Roxas went. I get out of bed, my body sore and I stumble out into the hallway. The living room light is on and I can hear voices. When I make my way out there I see Riku and Demyx, of course they're smoking and the natural blonde smiles at me, waving me over. "Good evening there Count Dracula," Demyx laughs and I groan, rubbing at my eyes as the smell of burning weed caresses my nose.

"What time is it?" I crack my back while Riku just shrugs, Demyx lifting his wrist to check the time. Riku passes me the blunt and I take it, waiting for Demyx to finally be able to tell me what I want to hear. It takes a little longer than I'd expect, Riku and me just smoking in silence, not having much to say.

"It's going to be six-thirty soon." My eyes widen and I turn rushing into the room to find a clean shirt. This turns out to be a lot harder than I expect, seeing as almost all my clothes is dirty. I pick up a sleeveless shirt, a little ragged but it's alright. I rip off a few loose seams and slip it on. It has a strange smell but I figure by the end of my show, I'll be so drenched in sweat you won't even notice. I rush out of my room with a brush but I give up with that. Some how my hair's gotten matted down to my head, maybe I teased it a little too much. Whatever, I'll brush out the knots when I have more time.

"How come you guys aren't rushing? We have a gig at seven!" I rush by Riku and Demyx, completely cutting off their conversation and Riku gasps before moving really slowly towards where his guitar sits. Demyx stretches and moves to put his shoes on. "Riku, are you okay to play?" I ask looking back at his pale face and sweaty forehead. He shakes his head, leaning the guitar against the wall and taking a deep breath. I guess now that the coke wore off he's starting to see the effects of being stabbed. It's probably hurting like a bitch right now.

"I think Xig is gonna have to cover…I need bed rest," He looks at me with dark rings under his blood shot eyes and I nod, moving to get out of the apartment but I stop and turn to ask Riku a question before he falls asleep.

"Hey…did you guys see where Roxas went?" I blink trying to act nonchalant but Riku can read me like an open book. He stops to stare at me and Demyx looks slightly confused. I guess I'll have to explain to him who Roxas is on the drive over to the club. I guess I look forward to talking about the little blonde for twenty minutes. Although the fact that he just ditches like that bothers me a little.

"He woke up early, said he needed to get to work or something. He was gone around four-thirty." Riku waves me out and I leave, locking the door and making my way down the hall wondering just where Roxas might work. I do the math in my head (so there is no guarantee that I'm right), figuring if Roxas woke up around 4 then that means he had at least a 15 hour crash. I'm dragged out of my thoughts by Demyx hooking his arm with mine and looking up at me through his long lashes.

"Zexion didn't come home last night," his voice is quiet and sad, such a contrast to his usual friendly, mellow tone. I frown, thinking back to what Riku told me about his accident and I have to wonder just what Zexion is doing with that blonde, spineless serpent. We break out into the city streets, Demyx passing me the blunt and I take it as the cold night air attacks my exposed arms. I shiver and hurry up my pace, Demyx easily falling into step with me. "I don't know where he went…he just kinda ditched me at the party. It really sucks 'cause I was thinking that maybe…you know…he's the one and I don't want anything ruining this." My throat feels kind of funny and I move my lazy tongue around my mouth, feeling the gum line along my teeth and the grooves in my molars before paying attention to anything Demyx just said and passing the blunt back.

"Don't say things like that unless you're serious," I say in a chastising tone, which internally makes me laugh because just today I was preaching about my love for Roxas, a tiny, blonde whore I just officially met once. Demyx and Zexion from what I've heard have been together for a while, or well long enough to have strong feelings, I guess. I'm really not a good judge for that; I fall in love way too easily. Obviously.

"I am!" Demyx pouts, tugging his arm out of my loop and leaving me to fight off the cold alone, walking with his arms tucked into a tight, black leather jacket, the blunt resting in between his lips. My eyes are caught by the silver trinkets hanging down from the hood of his jacket, resting on his chest. Now that I get a better look, I really like the leather garment.

"Hey…where'd you get that jacket?" I ask and Demyx looks down at himself, shrugging before running his fingers along the seams and smiling at me seductively, giving me the remainder of the weed. I have to stop myself from thinking he looks sexy and instead concentrate on what he's saying to me as I take a hit.

"Naminé makes them. She was offering to make for the whole band, I'm supposed to show it off…you know, like a model," Here he swirls around and laughs lightly, pushing a few stray hairs away from his face before stuffing his hands into his pockets again and walking a little faster. "I'm supposed to tell her your opinion tonight after the show, she says they're durable," I look down at the jacket and I can really see myself in one so I shrug my shoulders figuring, why the hell not?

"Sure, how much?" we keep walking, discussing the pricing Naminé's set up and I find it something I wouldn't mind paying for. I laugh right before turning down the alley that leads us into the back door of The Red Label, I throw the roach into a puddle before tugging open the large, heavy doors. I wonder if Xigbar is here, and I pray he doesn't decide to come in late, because we need him.

We walk in, going straight to the room they tell us is our _Green room_, but I don't see how though. It's just a closet with a light bulb and a leaky ceiling, oh and I can't forget the dingy sofa that Xigbar's probably pissed on a few times. Demyx goes and grabs his drum sticks, swirling them around his fingers while I warm up my vocal chords with a cigarette. It's not the best thing to do, but I don't really care. The door swings open and Xigbar's ugly mug appears. He looks like he got hit by a train and he glares at me, like it's my fault he looks a fright. "Way to back out of the fight. Riku got shanked by Vexen," Demyx rolls his eyes and just goes off to beat his sticks against the sofa. "You decided to leave with that little blonde guy, and left us to fight the crack heads!"

"Whoa, how was I supposed to know they'd attack?" I inhale some smoke before breathing it at him, blocking out his image for a few seconds before he swats it out of the air and comes in sharper focus. To be honest, I liked him better behind the smoke cloud. He squints, finally catching onto the fact that I'm high as a kite and he sighs, biting a piece of skin off his finger.

"Whatever man, where's Riku now?" Xigbar cracks his neck before a knock on the door lets us know we're up in the next five minutes. I decide I better tell Xigbar he's going to have to figure out a way to cover for Riku and quick. I scratch my knotted hair, deciding I should tie it and I do. I pull the black elastic around my thick hair and Xigbar just watches me with a frown. I can tell he's getting impatient as he watches me tie a loose pony tail. I drag the process on for a bit longer, just because I like to watch him squirm. I don't take too long though because if I do, he'll probably punch my stomach and I don't need that.

"He had to stay home, wasn't feeling good." His face tells me he's realized what this means and he cusses before yanking the door open and storming out of the green room. He's such a little drama queen. I look toward Demyx and the guy just shrugs before moving and following our scarred and ugly friend. Whatever I guess, Xigbar is just a little bitch sometimes. I walk out, already I can hear the crowd screaming, chanting our names and I inhale deeply, loving the stench filling the club right now. It's like smoke, sweat and booze.

This is perfect. This is what I'm made for, I decide as I hop onto the stage, staring down at everyone's faces as they jump around, pumped with adrenaline all just to hear me sing. I guess you could call me a real Rocket Queen.

* * *

**A/N: **I was told this today by one of my best friends "MUST YOU ALWAYS PUT KINGDOM HEARTS IN EVERYDAY LIFE?"  
Pfft, didn't tell her Kingdom Hearts IS life ;D  
I guess my random outbursts of "GOT IT MEMORIZED?" or "Talk about blank with a capital B" are getting on her nerves 8D  
TOO BAD!

Anyway, this is chapter five of Break Night and well...Axel is a dumb turd xD  
But I see him as more of a 'Love at first sight' kind of guy than Roxas. Roxas is too...well...too Roxasy.

Well, I hope you guys enjoyed this. I'm trying to get at least one more chapter on every story before classes start getting crazy.  
They just started for me today, and I'm so glad I have a spare first period (means I get to sleep in) :D  
Ehem...but I digress...Hope y'all enjoyed this and if I'm worth it, leave a review ;D!

Your Friendly Neighborhood Sharmander.


	6. Chapter 6

Hello everyone, and sorry that this is not an actual update. This is in fact **very serious**, so before you close this I'm begging you read it.

I was just informed by my dearest friend PinkFloydLady that there is something awful happening on called Redbottom, or something of the sort created by Lord Kelvin. I'm not too sure about all the details but what I have heard is that stories with 'mature' themes are being reported left, right and center for being in violation of the ToS. It's supposedly this program that scans stories and flags them when they have inappropriate content. The thing is, some stories don't even have anything bad, yet they are still being reported.

This post is just to say that if something does happen, and if this is real (if you know anything about this please, message me and let me in on the facts!) I will be leaving . I'm only saying this because I know a few of you follow my stories and I wouldn't want you all to be like 'whoa wtf?' and leave you all hanging. I could continue to write, but my posting will be somewhere else. Maybe on y!gallery, or deviantart. I'm not too sure.

My y!gallery name is the same (Sharmander) and my Deviantart account is Claaiiireee. I haven't posted anything there yet, but if something happens all my stories will be moved there and you guys can continue to follow them if you would like to. Just let me know if anyone's still interested in reading outside of .

Thank you all so much, and if this is really happening I am going to miss this website very much ):

Signed with a heavy heart, Sharmander.


	7. Important To Readers

Dear Readers,

**Break Night**_, _will not be moving forward.  
I've lost all interest in the story. After the first chapter, the story went all weird. I wrote things I didn't want to write and the story turned into something completely different from the first idea I had, that had inspired me to start this. It was such a good idea to me, I had been so excited. Alas, my brain sometimes plays tricks and makes it hard to get my ideas from my mind to my finger tips. If my desktop is still intact, I have another story in the works that has gone in the original direction I wanted for Break Night. The day I get my computer back, I shall post the beginnings of that.

For anyone reading this, who reads any of my other stories, those are still being worked on.  
**This is the only story being discontinued.**

Thank you all so much for being so amazing.

-A Very Discombobulated Sharmander.


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